if I didn't like you so much.
Why can't you...
-be 5 feet tall
-have bad taste in music like only listening to Miley Cyrus and Los Lonely Boys
-dress in Ed Hardy and wear jeans with dragon embroidery on it
-not adore all of the same movies I love and be able to repeat all the lines
-have a lazy eye like Quasi-Moto instead of nice brooding eyes
-be a complete and utter asshole and not care about anyone's feelings
-not have an affinity for humor and just say dumb dick jokes that all other guys use
-be that one guy that all the girls want
why can't you be anyone else but you?
<3 hopeless romantic
Wednesday, December 23, 2009
Monday, October 26, 2009
"Alright let's cut the shit, It's time to get SERIOUS"
It was a thursday evening around 5:45pm when I had a revelation that came tooooo late. I take economics at a community college twice a week from 6-9pm, meaning for 8 weeks I'll have no life. It took the second day of my class for me to realize why I was there.
I came to class 15 mins. early because I like sitting in the back, and to be honest there are freaking weird ass people in that class, so I try and sit in the back with my purse on the seat next to me to avoid awkward situations. As if I'm not awkward enough.
When I was waiting for class to start, I heard some of the students talking to the professor and they were all completely and utterly engaged in a conversation about economics. They weren't shooting the shit, they were ACTUALLY TALKING ABOUT THINGS THAT MATTERED AND KNOWING WHAT THEY WERE TALKING ABOUT.
...and it dawned on me, they were going to school to LEARN.
I know what you're thinking, uh no shit Jenn...isn't that why you go to school?
When I was a freshmen... YES, now I'm not too sure.
It all came full circle, these ADULTS who were in my class were students genuinely trying to learn and trying to transfer to a 4 year university. I was taking the class because I was blindsided by getting an "easy A" at the community college. They were taking that class, because they were interested in both the topic and transferring.
I complain about taking 15 units, but some of the people in this class were full time students who also worked 2 jobs and still managed to make it to class and understand the content.
I felt like for the first time in a long time, I was in an environment where I was meant to better myself.
Somehow with the partying and drugs and sex, a blurred line develops that stands in the way of why you even went to college in the first place.
Today, there are no TABOOs. Everything is said, everything is done, everything become so played out and passe.
I get so sick and tired of hearing about raves, dropping E, and getting high all the time. When did it ever become okay in society to brag about how many times you intoxicated your body full of unnnatural substances. Why is it that the only dates we care about are the ones where a rave event is coming up. Why is it that people parade around their bongs, pipes, and miscellaneous weed paraphalnalia like they just won the nobel prize? I have done drugs, and I certainly don't look down on people who do them, but in a short life when we only have so much time to make something of ourselves...don't we want to take that extra hour we spent getting high and do something ACTUALLY PRODUCTIVE?
Sex has become so over inflated in college, that it doesn't become a matter or interest in a person, it becomes a number. I personally am not promiscuous in this subject, those of you who know me, KNOW THAT. However, when someone's prime goal at a party is "to get some", then I think...can't you do that sober? Call me old fashioned, but I do believe in romance. If you slept with over 10 people and less than half are people that you've dated seriously, then boo boo we got some problems. I know that you're thinking, "Ain't no fun if the homies can't have none". But today, another lyric that goes with that is "Ain't no fun if the STDS come!" yeah...if all else fails, please use protection, otherwise I'm gonna make you name your baby after me.
What handle are you bringing to the party?
Alcohol, has become so mainstream that I honestly don't know why I drink it anymore. I hate being drunk, I like being buzzed, but I've lived over 17 years before I actually started drinking. I could probably live another 17 years without drinking, if I tried. Seeing drunk people get all crazy and sloppy and sometimes too wild gets old, after awhile...I just wanna change the channel.
I know what you all are thinking, what the hell Jenn..this blog was depressing and hypocritical!
Well I say suck it.
I heard these students having A REAL CONVERSATION about things that mattered, cut the bullshit. It's time to get serious.
PEOPLE WHO ONLY CARE ABOUT SEX, DRUGS, AND ALCOHOL NEED NOT APPLY:
I'm looking for some good company...who like to party SOMETIMES.
even though I do dread the 3 hours I spend twice a week in that class...at least I'm learning something.
...and sometimes that's better than nothing.
OKAY, OKAY back to less morose and thought provoking blogs.
-j
(don't worry, I'm still tryna party...just not EVERY week)
Not my motto...
ME UP.
I came to class 15 mins. early because I like sitting in the back, and to be honest there are freaking weird ass people in that class, so I try and sit in the back with my purse on the seat next to me to avoid awkward situations. As if I'm not awkward enough.
When I was waiting for class to start, I heard some of the students talking to the professor and they were all completely and utterly engaged in a conversation about economics. They weren't shooting the shit, they were ACTUALLY TALKING ABOUT THINGS THAT MATTERED AND KNOWING WHAT THEY WERE TALKING ABOUT.
...and it dawned on me, they were going to school to LEARN.
I know what you're thinking, uh no shit Jenn...isn't that why you go to school?
When I was a freshmen... YES, now I'm not too sure.
It all came full circle, these ADULTS who were in my class were students genuinely trying to learn and trying to transfer to a 4 year university. I was taking the class because I was blindsided by getting an "easy A" at the community college. They were taking that class, because they were interested in both the topic and transferring.
I complain about taking 15 units, but some of the people in this class were full time students who also worked 2 jobs and still managed to make it to class and understand the content.
I felt like for the first time in a long time, I was in an environment where I was meant to better myself.
Somehow with the partying and drugs and sex, a blurred line develops that stands in the way of why you even went to college in the first place.
Today, there are no TABOOs. Everything is said, everything is done, everything become so played out and passe.
I get so sick and tired of hearing about raves, dropping E, and getting high all the time. When did it ever become okay in society to brag about how many times you intoxicated your body full of unnnatural substances. Why is it that the only dates we care about are the ones where a rave event is coming up. Why is it that people parade around their bongs, pipes, and miscellaneous weed paraphalnalia like they just won the nobel prize? I have done drugs, and I certainly don't look down on people who do them, but in a short life when we only have so much time to make something of ourselves...don't we want to take that extra hour we spent getting high and do something ACTUALLY PRODUCTIVE?
Sex has become so over inflated in college, that it doesn't become a matter or interest in a person, it becomes a number. I personally am not promiscuous in this subject, those of you who know me, KNOW THAT. However, when someone's prime goal at a party is "to get some", then I think...can't you do that sober? Call me old fashioned, but I do believe in romance. If you slept with over 10 people and less than half are people that you've dated seriously, then boo boo we got some problems. I know that you're thinking, "Ain't no fun if the homies can't have none". But today, another lyric that goes with that is "Ain't no fun if the STDS come!" yeah...if all else fails, please use protection, otherwise I'm gonna make you name your baby after me.
What handle are you bringing to the party?
Alcohol, has become so mainstream that I honestly don't know why I drink it anymore. I hate being drunk, I like being buzzed, but I've lived over 17 years before I actually started drinking. I could probably live another 17 years without drinking, if I tried. Seeing drunk people get all crazy and sloppy and sometimes too wild gets old, after awhile...I just wanna change the channel.
I know what you all are thinking, what the hell Jenn..this blog was depressing and hypocritical!
Well I say suck it.
I heard these students having A REAL CONVERSATION about things that mattered, cut the bullshit. It's time to get serious.
PEOPLE WHO ONLY CARE ABOUT SEX, DRUGS, AND ALCOHOL NEED NOT APPLY:
I'm looking for some good company...who like to party SOMETIMES.
even though I do dread the 3 hours I spend twice a week in that class...at least I'm learning something.
...and sometimes that's better than nothing.
OKAY, OKAY back to less morose and thought provoking blogs.
-j
(don't worry, I'm still tryna party...just not EVERY week)
Not my motto...
ME UP.
Sunday, October 25, 2009
Greek Sauce...(get it?)
I've officially been submerged into the "Greek" language, and I can barely speak my own native language.
So I've been known as the weirdo all my life with weird lingo, and certain words and sentences I piece together, I hardly know what it means. However when I did become part of a sorority and hang out more and more with greek people, I started to pick up certain things that I have honestly never heard before. Some phrases/words I actually do like and use from time to time, but there are just some words that I feel should be deleted from having that second connotation.
Ready, set, flow...
SWOOOOOOOOP!
ex: "I was gonna make out with DeAndre, but Deshawnda helllla swooooooped on me!"
Meaning someone inadvertedly cockblocked you. I actually do like this term, because it is sort of a swift movement that goes on, when someone does sweep that person from underneath your feet. Like, SWOOP THERE IT IS! Trust me, it happens a lot. So much that you need a saying that is short and sweet and straight to the point, I believe that SWOOP does that. The noun "Swooper" is even better, cause let's be honest, there are a lot out there, and sometimes I do prefer to be politically correct and say SWOOPER, instead of COCKBLOCKER in front of people. Especially children ages 3+
CROSS FADED
ex: "I can't drove home, I'm fucked up...I'm cross faded"
Okay, so technically I heard this term in highschool. However I was hoping that when I got to college that it was going to disappear because it sounds really stupid. It means that you're under the influence 2 different ways, usually high and drunk. I think it sounds more like something in MORTAL COMBAT or like TOKYO DRIFT. Like "Omg Scorpion just cross faded Sub Zero." Unfortunately that term is here to stay.
CUPCAKE
So I don't know if like Fat Joe invented this term or Rosie O' Donnell but I personally HATE this term.
ex: "Yoker is totally cupcaking with Jelissa" (yeah I tried it make it sound cholo)
WHAT THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN MEAN? Technically I guess it means to be sweet to someone. But if that were the case, why can't we use the term..."Donut?"
Like, "Dammmmmmmn Yoker is donuting with Jelissa" Same shit, different pastry.
All I know is, if someone refers to me dating someone as cupcaking, I will literally take a real cupcake and smash it in their face. Sorry, so angry. But food should never be a reference to romance...with one exception: "I love you like a fat kid loves cake". Thanks 50.
FAMS/Pseudo/Fave= Don't hate these terms, but don't love em either. What ever happened to calling people by their names, or by other terms of endearment like "booboo"?
THE PIT
okay...so this only really related to my school.
ex: "I parked at the pit, walk with me so I don't get buttraped!"
The pit refers to the area that is between 2 parking structures. I guess you could call it the middle, but the pit is more distinct. I surprisingly always park there so yes I do use the term. However only certain people call it that, and if you were to say it to anyone else, they would think you were crazy. I personally think "the pit" sounds like a ring for illegal cockfighting and drugs. "I picked up my meth at the pit" or "Yeah I got gonorrhea from the pit". Don't worry these sentences are fake, nothing like that goes on in the pit. I HOPE, OTHERWISE I HAVE TO FIND SOMEWHERE ELSE TO PARK.
So I could post up 589328502530 more words and phrases that I hear allll the time now in college, but I am on the verge of getting carpal tunnel syndrome (spelling?) or arthritis in my hands. Same shit, different term.
You get the point...
go slang!
<3 j boo boo (a.k.a. not a swooper)
So I've been known as the weirdo all my life with weird lingo, and certain words and sentences I piece together, I hardly know what it means. However when I did become part of a sorority and hang out more and more with greek people, I started to pick up certain things that I have honestly never heard before. Some phrases/words I actually do like and use from time to time, but there are just some words that I feel should be deleted from having that second connotation.
Ready, set, flow...
SWOOOOOOOOP!
ex: "I was gonna make out with DeAndre, but Deshawnda helllla swooooooped on me!"
Meaning someone inadvertedly cockblocked you. I actually do like this term, because it is sort of a swift movement that goes on, when someone does sweep that person from underneath your feet. Like, SWOOP THERE IT IS! Trust me, it happens a lot. So much that you need a saying that is short and sweet and straight to the point, I believe that SWOOP does that. The noun "Swooper" is even better, cause let's be honest, there are a lot out there, and sometimes I do prefer to be politically correct and say SWOOPER, instead of COCKBLOCKER in front of people. Especially children ages 3+
CROSS FADED
ex: "I can't drove home, I'm fucked up...I'm cross faded"
Okay, so technically I heard this term in highschool. However I was hoping that when I got to college that it was going to disappear because it sounds really stupid. It means that you're under the influence 2 different ways, usually high and drunk. I think it sounds more like something in MORTAL COMBAT or like TOKYO DRIFT. Like "Omg Scorpion just cross faded Sub Zero." Unfortunately that term is here to stay.
CUPCAKE
So I don't know if like Fat Joe invented this term or Rosie O' Donnell but I personally HATE this term.
ex: "Yoker is totally cupcaking with Jelissa" (yeah I tried it make it sound cholo)
WHAT THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN MEAN? Technically I guess it means to be sweet to someone. But if that were the case, why can't we use the term..."Donut?"
Like, "Dammmmmmmn Yoker is donuting with Jelissa" Same shit, different pastry.
All I know is, if someone refers to me dating someone as cupcaking, I will literally take a real cupcake and smash it in their face. Sorry, so angry. But food should never be a reference to romance...with one exception: "I love you like a fat kid loves cake". Thanks 50.
FAMS/Pseudo/Fave= Don't hate these terms, but don't love em either. What ever happened to calling people by their names, or by other terms of endearment like "booboo"?
THE PIT
okay...so this only really related to my school.
ex: "I parked at the pit, walk with me so I don't get buttraped!"
The pit refers to the area that is between 2 parking structures. I guess you could call it the middle, but the pit is more distinct. I surprisingly always park there so yes I do use the term. However only certain people call it that, and if you were to say it to anyone else, they would think you were crazy. I personally think "the pit" sounds like a ring for illegal cockfighting and drugs. "I picked up my meth at the pit" or "Yeah I got gonorrhea from the pit". Don't worry these sentences are fake, nothing like that goes on in the pit. I HOPE, OTHERWISE I HAVE TO FIND SOMEWHERE ELSE TO PARK.
So I could post up 589328502530 more words and phrases that I hear allll the time now in college, but I am on the verge of getting carpal tunnel syndrome (spelling?) or arthritis in my hands. Same shit, different term.
You get the point...
go slang!
<3 j boo boo (a.k.a. not a swooper)
Trick whORe Treat
So as I am writing this, I am thinking of all of the brilliant halloween costumes that I have seen throughout the ages.
One common theme that I did notice, was that as the years go by less and less is worn by both men and women!
I mean, I know there's a recession but I'm pretty sure walking out in a loincloth and messy hair and saying that you're Tarzan is still borderline indecent exposure. (which can sometimes be a good thing, am I right ladies?) haha. Anywhozels, here's an example.
The point of Halloween was to wear something scary right? The point is to scare people with a ridiculously and shockingly gruesome costume...
I guess the ladies are taking a different approach, they are using the OTHER scare factor. Pretty much, the message in this era is "I'm going to look so goddamn sexy in my string of a costume that I'm going to scare your pants off". Am I right? Why else would the typical gorilla costume be later translated into society today as a girl just wearing a fur bikini and holding a banana. I guess it's the same.
This is what used to be considered normal...
Now this is more of what you see on the streets...circa NOW
So here are a couple of SHALLOWeen costumes that I have thought of for you ladies, who want to use this scary holiday as a chance to showcase their lack of or gift of good looks.
Banana...
I know what you're thinking, WHY THE FUCK WOULD I WANT TO BE A BANANA? They aren't even sexy. Here's my idea ladies. Find a tight yellow dress that has a zipper in the front, trust me. There are some. Then wear a cute creme colored bra underneath and unzip it enough so that you can see the bra, and wear it with yellow pumps. Then just make a Chiquita banana sticker stick it on anywhere you want. Possibly by the end of the night, the whole peel will come off.
Grizzly bear...
I know you're thinking...being hairy is NOT CUTE BOO BOO. But I saw a black fur vest at forever 21 ( yeah of course there! right?) So wear that black fur vest with a cute black bra and some black boyshorts. Then take make some black bear ears out of cutting up felt and gluing it to a headband. Finally finishing touches, I saw a honey jar purse at party city, and some black pumps. ta-dah! you just made winnie the pooh look like a douche.
Michael Jackson...
I know that every guy is probably going to be Michael Jackson for halloween cause he is THE LEGEND, however girls can too. Just wear a cute white shirt, but tie it up so that your stomach shows. Next wear it with either a red/maroon leather jacket or a member's only jacket ( something bomber jacket style). Next wear some sequined booty shorts (saw some at pink zone) with white socks that show and black heels. Finally finish it off with a white sequined glove, and a cute fedora hat.
So...those are just a few ideas that I know most people think of and assume girls cannot make sexy. However, it is possible! Trust me, if you can make a nun outfit slutty, you can make BABYBOP slutty!
I don't know exactly what I'm going to be for halloween, but I have a couple of tricks up my sleeve. Looks like you're just going to have to hang out with me to see what I am. I ain't playa hating, I always skank up my halloween costume...I have been since 8th grade (don't tell my mom).
However, there is one costume that I WOULD NOT MIND SEEING THIS YEAR...
...SEXaroni pizza, anyone? I'll have a slice.
-dont quote me on that...
<3 jenilla killah
One common theme that I did notice, was that as the years go by less and less is worn by both men and women!
I mean, I know there's a recession but I'm pretty sure walking out in a loincloth and messy hair and saying that you're Tarzan is still borderline indecent exposure. (which can sometimes be a good thing, am I right ladies?) haha. Anywhozels, here's an example.
The point of Halloween was to wear something scary right? The point is to scare people with a ridiculously and shockingly gruesome costume...
I guess the ladies are taking a different approach, they are using the OTHER scare factor. Pretty much, the message in this era is "I'm going to look so goddamn sexy in my string of a costume that I'm going to scare your pants off". Am I right? Why else would the typical gorilla costume be later translated into society today as a girl just wearing a fur bikini and holding a banana. I guess it's the same.
This is what used to be considered normal...
Now this is more of what you see on the streets...circa NOW
So here are a couple of SHALLOWeen costumes that I have thought of for you ladies, who want to use this scary holiday as a chance to showcase their lack of or gift of good looks.
Banana...
I know what you're thinking, WHY THE FUCK WOULD I WANT TO BE A BANANA? They aren't even sexy. Here's my idea ladies. Find a tight yellow dress that has a zipper in the front, trust me. There are some. Then wear a cute creme colored bra underneath and unzip it enough so that you can see the bra, and wear it with yellow pumps. Then just make a Chiquita banana sticker stick it on anywhere you want. Possibly by the end of the night, the whole peel will come off.
Grizzly bear...
I know you're thinking...being hairy is NOT CUTE BOO BOO. But I saw a black fur vest at forever 21 ( yeah of course there! right?) So wear that black fur vest with a cute black bra and some black boyshorts. Then take make some black bear ears out of cutting up felt and gluing it to a headband. Finally finishing touches, I saw a honey jar purse at party city, and some black pumps. ta-dah! you just made winnie the pooh look like a douche.
Michael Jackson...
I know that every guy is probably going to be Michael Jackson for halloween cause he is THE LEGEND, however girls can too. Just wear a cute white shirt, but tie it up so that your stomach shows. Next wear it with either a red/maroon leather jacket or a member's only jacket ( something bomber jacket style). Next wear some sequined booty shorts (saw some at pink zone) with white socks that show and black heels. Finally finish it off with a white sequined glove, and a cute fedora hat.
So...those are just a few ideas that I know most people think of and assume girls cannot make sexy. However, it is possible! Trust me, if you can make a nun outfit slutty, you can make BABYBOP slutty!
I don't know exactly what I'm going to be for halloween, but I have a couple of tricks up my sleeve. Looks like you're just going to have to hang out with me to see what I am. I ain't playa hating, I always skank up my halloween costume...I have been since 8th grade (don't tell my mom).
However, there is one costume that I WOULD NOT MIND SEEING THIS YEAR...
...SEXaroni pizza, anyone? I'll have a slice.
-dont quote me on that...
<3 jenilla killah
Monday, September 28, 2009
"It's me Bitches...."
So I was on a break with Blogspot for awhile, for those of you who actually care...all 3 of you. Yes Christine you are definitely one of the 3. Also yes it was a break, an actual one like Ross and Rachel on the best show ever, FRIENDS. But then I realized that FUCK, I MISS YOU BLOGSPOT...CAN I HAVE A 2ND CHANCE? I'LL LET YOU GO TO 2ND BASE WITH ME? and of course Blogspot couldn't resist...SO I'M BACK PUTAS.
This particular entry is really just going to be an update of current events that have happened...
Customer Complaint #2:
So these four filipino guys came into my store sunday and long story short, this jiggaboo with small ass size 8 feet got allllll types of offended just because I wasn't "Sally Sunshine" to him when I grabbed him the 5 pairs of shoes he tried on. Meanwhile while this dickhead is trying on his baby shoes, his friends are just sitting on all of the benches taking up space. ANNOYING. So when he wanted to buy one of the shoes on display, all I asked was if he wanted to try it on before he purchased it...I GUESS IT WAS THE SAME AS TELLING HIM TO "SUCK IT" BECAUSE HE GOT REALLY OFFENDED. I guess....
So then he bought the shoes and asked Maggie for the "customer complaint number", I guess I wasn't nice enough to him? I mean what did he expect? For me to helllllla put the shoes on his feet for him, cradle him, and tell him that "everything's gonna be alright". Come the fuck on, I barely give that treatment to babies who try on shoes in my store. Trust me, I can act bitchy as fuck if I wanted to...but I wasn't. In the end it just shows...some guys are sensitive pricks. Hmmm moving on...
My love life...
What's non existant + invisible = a pretty fucking dry spell.
My love life is so non existant, that sometimes I just want to bust out in song singing "I want to know what love is" by Foreigner? but then I realize that that's creepy and really it's me that's making my love life absent is that I just refuse to lower my standards. Plus all of the guys that I do fancy, end up liking some other bitch who usually has the cute factor...you know like shorter than 5'8'' and wears forever 21 and hollister/abercrombie and listens to mainstream music, AKA NOT ME.
I guess if I wanted a guy right now I could have one...just not one that I wanted, I could have a shorter guy with spikey hair, listens to soley hip hop and r&b, wears socks with sandals, and PROBABLY HANGS OUT AT TAPIOCA EXPRESS 3 TIMES A WEEK. Thank you, DON'T COME AGAIN.
Oh yeah, this guy that I liked all last summer and until last winter came into my store with HIS NEW GIRLFRIEND...and then after I threw a hammer at his head. Just kidding...it was a refridgerator. (then I threw a wrench at his girlfriend, because you know...I don't know her personally, so you gotta start small). Fuck it.
I just wish that one of these days I can do a little something something to the Drake and Lykke Li version of "Little Bit". Such a sexy song, holy cow.
My rap name is like Coolio but with an S, Scoolio?
So School, GOTTA STUDY GOTTA STUDY GOTTA STUDY GOTTA STUDY. I am on the brink of graduating in 5 years, and I'm okay with that. As long as I graduate before my 15 yr old cousin, I'm good. Brenda girl, I hope you slow your roll.
I'm working on my EASY A class, general studies 420 and damn I really hope that this class brings up my gpa a whole lot...otherwise it's goodbye social life, HELLO CONFINED ROOM WITH 4 WALLS AND INTERNET ACCESS SOLELY TO GOOGLE SCHOLAR.
Let's see...what else is going on?
-a short mexican guy denied repeatedly annoyingly poking my ass with his watch accidentally before the common and friends concert.
-i am obsessed with ice cream milk tea from tapex...it's close to heaven in your mouth. rich and creamy, just like.......A MILKSHAKE. if you were thinking about something else, jiggas you nasty!
-i have kept up a pretty damn good streak of NOT WEARING JEANS/PANTS to school thus far, which will hopefully enable to keep my luxurious leg tan longer since all I've been wearing were gam exposing outfits...like you know star pasties and bootyshorts.
-I finally realized that my older coworker who has been hitting on me for the past year is SORT OF CUTE...but that's it.
-I really should get another job before these customer complaints push me in the unemployment line.
-I need to join 24 hour fitness because bathing suit season is over, but all of the major EAT TILL YOUR BOOTY DROPS holidays are coming up and I must stay "in shape".
-After seeing Common at his concert, realized that he has a BEAUTIFUL face structure.
Last but not least...I WILL FINALLY RESSURECT (SPELLING?) MY BLOGSPOT. (until it pisses me off again and we get a divorce for good)
Peace, love, and Sweet tea (craving some, fuck! mcdonald's is closed)
-jenilli jenilli jenilli
This particular entry is really just going to be an update of current events that have happened...
Customer Complaint #2:
So these four filipino guys came into my store sunday and long story short, this jiggaboo with small ass size 8 feet got allllll types of offended just because I wasn't "Sally Sunshine" to him when I grabbed him the 5 pairs of shoes he tried on. Meanwhile while this dickhead is trying on his baby shoes, his friends are just sitting on all of the benches taking up space. ANNOYING. So when he wanted to buy one of the shoes on display, all I asked was if he wanted to try it on before he purchased it...I GUESS IT WAS THE SAME AS TELLING HIM TO "SUCK IT" BECAUSE HE GOT REALLY OFFENDED. I guess....
So then he bought the shoes and asked Maggie for the "customer complaint number", I guess I wasn't nice enough to him? I mean what did he expect? For me to helllllla put the shoes on his feet for him, cradle him, and tell him that "everything's gonna be alright". Come the fuck on, I barely give that treatment to babies who try on shoes in my store. Trust me, I can act bitchy as fuck if I wanted to...but I wasn't. In the end it just shows...some guys are sensitive pricks. Hmmm moving on...
My love life...
What's non existant + invisible = a pretty fucking dry spell.
My love life is so non existant, that sometimes I just want to bust out in song singing "I want to know what love is" by Foreigner? but then I realize that that's creepy and really it's me that's making my love life absent is that I just refuse to lower my standards. Plus all of the guys that I do fancy, end up liking some other bitch who usually has the cute factor...you know like shorter than 5'8'' and wears forever 21 and hollister/abercrombie and listens to mainstream music, AKA NOT ME.
I guess if I wanted a guy right now I could have one...just not one that I wanted, I could have a shorter guy with spikey hair, listens to soley hip hop and r&b, wears socks with sandals, and PROBABLY HANGS OUT AT TAPIOCA EXPRESS 3 TIMES A WEEK. Thank you, DON'T COME AGAIN.
Oh yeah, this guy that I liked all last summer and until last winter came into my store with HIS NEW GIRLFRIEND...and then after I threw a hammer at his head. Just kidding...it was a refridgerator. (then I threw a wrench at his girlfriend, because you know...I don't know her personally, so you gotta start small). Fuck it.
I just wish that one of these days I can do a little something something to the Drake and Lykke Li version of "Little Bit". Such a sexy song, holy cow.
My rap name is like Coolio but with an S, Scoolio?
So School, GOTTA STUDY GOTTA STUDY GOTTA STUDY GOTTA STUDY. I am on the brink of graduating in 5 years, and I'm okay with that. As long as I graduate before my 15 yr old cousin, I'm good. Brenda girl, I hope you slow your roll.
I'm working on my EASY A class, general studies 420 and damn I really hope that this class brings up my gpa a whole lot...otherwise it's goodbye social life, HELLO CONFINED ROOM WITH 4 WALLS AND INTERNET ACCESS SOLELY TO GOOGLE SCHOLAR.
Let's see...what else is going on?
-a short mexican guy denied repeatedly annoyingly poking my ass with his watch accidentally before the common and friends concert.
-i am obsessed with ice cream milk tea from tapex...it's close to heaven in your mouth. rich and creamy, just like.......A MILKSHAKE. if you were thinking about something else, jiggas you nasty!
-i have kept up a pretty damn good streak of NOT WEARING JEANS/PANTS to school thus far, which will hopefully enable to keep my luxurious leg tan longer since all I've been wearing were gam exposing outfits...like you know star pasties and bootyshorts.
-I finally realized that my older coworker who has been hitting on me for the past year is SORT OF CUTE...but that's it.
-I really should get another job before these customer complaints push me in the unemployment line.
-I need to join 24 hour fitness because bathing suit season is over, but all of the major EAT TILL YOUR BOOTY DROPS holidays are coming up and I must stay "in shape".
-After seeing Common at his concert, realized that he has a BEAUTIFUL face structure.
Last but not least...I WILL FINALLY RESSURECT (SPELLING?) MY BLOGSPOT. (until it pisses me off again and we get a divorce for good)
Peace, love, and Sweet tea (craving some, fuck! mcdonald's is closed)
-jenilli jenilli jenilli
Sunday, May 17, 2009
Dear Koala...
Hello, sorry I haven't posted anything for awhile but I've been busy with finals and formals! fucking formals...good times.
Anyways, I just realized that because school is over, there's no more KOALA! Which means I have to wait next year to submit something, and I've really spent a lot of time thinking about all of the things I would write in the Koala...but I always forget to submit it.
For those of you who think I am only referring to that cute ass marsupial from down under, I am actually referring to the school's underground newspaper that's devoting to talking shit and offending everyone and they mama.
There's actually rumors that the newspaper is run by kids from ucsd, and thats why they are talking shit about sdsu students...but um i dont know anyone from ucsd who is not uptight and frigid....so i dont believe that its from kids there. oops, i totally just talked shit about ucsd kids, whatever...moving on.
So basically, these are some posts that I wish I could've posted in THE KOALA, because let's be honest...offending people inadvertently is sort of second nature to me.
So as I'm listening to "Turn you on" by Kevin Little/lyttle?...here are some things I wish i put in the last edition of this year's Koala...
Dear Hot Spaniard in my choir 1:00pm class,
I wish that i could see what it takes for you to get into your cute skinny jeans and your adorable ass dress shirt....literally, you could dress in front of me (or undress). It's too bad that we had to sit in sectionals all year long, otherwise my alto singing ass would've dropped my voice a couple octaves lower so that I could sit on your lap in the bass and baritone section. Also, if you ever want to ditch your girlfriend...you can call me and we can "sing together" naked.
To all of the assholes in my poli sci mw 11:00 class who sit in the middle in the back section,
SHUT THE FUCK UP, we know that you're fucking retarded already since you all look like you're 25+ and its a prereq for freshmen and sophmores. I know that for you all, it is a very difficult concept to not talk or even whisper in a lecture, but come the fuck on...if i can hear you, and im sitting 5 rows in front of you...it means you should lower your voices or go socialize in the middle of the road..SO I CAN RUN YOUR ASSES OVER. thanks!
To whom it may concern:
DRIVING A BIG ASS GAS GUZZLING TRUCK does not mean you can take up two parking spaces, it may mean that you're compensating for other smaller things in your (pants) life... but learn how to park unless you want "asshole" carved into your side door.
Dear guy who I've had two classes with this year,
Even though I think you're gay and everyone else does too...I still totally think you're cute and that you should just pick a side and stick with it...and by side I mean heterosexuality...and my heterosexuality I mean me, and by me I mean 858-2#4-1234 hahah
ok so those are the only potential Koala posts that I have so far...I have more but -that would require an NC-17 rating and a vulgarity pre-warning SO INSTEAD I'LL SAVE THEM FOR NEXT YEAR'S KOALAS.
peace, love, and furry marsupials from down under,
jp
Anyways, I just realized that because school is over, there's no more KOALA! Which means I have to wait next year to submit something, and I've really spent a lot of time thinking about all of the things I would write in the Koala...but I always forget to submit it.
For those of you who think I am only referring to that cute ass marsupial from down under, I am actually referring to the school's underground newspaper that's devoting to talking shit and offending everyone and they mama.
There's actually rumors that the newspaper is run by kids from ucsd, and thats why they are talking shit about sdsu students...but um i dont know anyone from ucsd who is not uptight and frigid....so i dont believe that its from kids there. oops, i totally just talked shit about ucsd kids, whatever...moving on.
So basically, these are some posts that I wish I could've posted in THE KOALA, because let's be honest...offending people inadvertently is sort of second nature to me.
So as I'm listening to "Turn you on" by Kevin Little/lyttle?...here are some things I wish i put in the last edition of this year's Koala...
Dear Hot Spaniard in my choir 1:00pm class,
I wish that i could see what it takes for you to get into your cute skinny jeans and your adorable ass dress shirt....literally, you could dress in front of me (or undress). It's too bad that we had to sit in sectionals all year long, otherwise my alto singing ass would've dropped my voice a couple octaves lower so that I could sit on your lap in the bass and baritone section. Also, if you ever want to ditch your girlfriend...you can call me and we can "sing together" naked.
To all of the assholes in my poli sci mw 11:00 class who sit in the middle in the back section,
SHUT THE FUCK UP, we know that you're fucking retarded already since you all look like you're 25+ and its a prereq for freshmen and sophmores. I know that for you all, it is a very difficult concept to not talk or even whisper in a lecture, but come the fuck on...if i can hear you, and im sitting 5 rows in front of you...it means you should lower your voices or go socialize in the middle of the road..SO I CAN RUN YOUR ASSES OVER. thanks!
To whom it may concern:
DRIVING A BIG ASS GAS GUZZLING TRUCK does not mean you can take up two parking spaces, it may mean that you're compensating for other smaller things in your (pants) life... but learn how to park unless you want "asshole" carved into your side door.
Dear guy who I've had two classes with this year,
Even though I think you're gay and everyone else does too...I still totally think you're cute and that you should just pick a side and stick with it...and by side I mean heterosexuality...and my heterosexuality I mean me, and by me I mean 858-2#4-1234 hahah
ok so those are the only potential Koala posts that I have so far...I have more but -that would require an NC-17 rating and a vulgarity pre-warning SO INSTEAD I'LL SAVE THEM FOR NEXT YEAR'S KOALAS.
peace, love, and furry marsupials from down under,
jp
Sunday, May 10, 2009
Repeat Offender
I recently became totally discouraged by one motherfucker at forever 21 who instantly recognized me...and sort of insulted me. haha
So here's the scene...
I step into forever 21 on my lunch break because it never takes me 1 hour to eat and because it's the only store at the mall that I actually like...urban and am.apparel are walking distance, but I don't feel like actually walking all the way there and back.
...and one out of the 45 gentlemen who now work there said,
"MAN, YOU'RE LIKE HERE EVERYDAY" one of the forever 21 guys recognized me. FML
So it's been two days since that incident, and I've been 2 days sober for going into forever 21. thank goodness, that place may be cheap but it burns a hole through my wallet.
Whatever
Next repeated offense...
My older sister who I sort of look like, went into AMERICAN APPAREL at fashion valley mall and made a purchase...
The sales girl asked to see her id for her credit card purchase, and then said, I quote...
"Are you related to jennifer?"
I don't even know the bitch! but i shop there enough for her to check my id enough times. FML
So that makes 2, let's see where to next?
I know, let's go back to the mall I work at...where the STARBUCKS KNOWS MY EXACT DRINK, I pretty much know each person who works at that starbucks now, and they even give me free drinks once in awhile...i guess it's okay to be known by them.
So last place, where I am totally a repeat offender..
First off, I blame it all on my best friend linh who introduced me to the place!
URBANE CAFE, the best sandwich shop known to man! I go there mostly thursdays because they have my favorite soup on that day only: tomato bisque with their southwest chicken sandwich would be my last supper if I was going to jail.
How do they know me?
When I come in to pick up my order, the same lady hands it to me without even asking what I ordered or whose name it's under. Linh, I blame it on you.
So what did i learn from all of this? Maybe I really should go other places, and NOT BE SO USED TO A ROUTINE.
It's a good thing, life isn't like the game monopoly...otherwise, MY ASS WOULD BE SENT STRAIGHT TO JAIL!
fuck, i always lose that game. damn it. haha
peace, love, and peace and love, and peace and love...and NO MORE REPEATS! (sometimes)
-j
So here's the scene...
I step into forever 21 on my lunch break because it never takes me 1 hour to eat and because it's the only store at the mall that I actually like...urban and am.apparel are walking distance, but I don't feel like actually walking all the way there and back.
...and one out of the 45 gentlemen who now work there said,
"MAN, YOU'RE LIKE HERE EVERYDAY" one of the forever 21 guys recognized me. FML
So it's been two days since that incident, and I've been 2 days sober for going into forever 21. thank goodness, that place may be cheap but it burns a hole through my wallet.
Whatever
Next repeated offense...
My older sister who I sort of look like, went into AMERICAN APPAREL at fashion valley mall and made a purchase...
The sales girl asked to see her id for her credit card purchase, and then said, I quote...
"Are you related to jennifer?"
I don't even know the bitch! but i shop there enough for her to check my id enough times. FML
So that makes 2, let's see where to next?
I know, let's go back to the mall I work at...where the STARBUCKS KNOWS MY EXACT DRINK, I pretty much know each person who works at that starbucks now, and they even give me free drinks once in awhile...i guess it's okay to be known by them.
So last place, where I am totally a repeat offender..
First off, I blame it all on my best friend linh who introduced me to the place!
URBANE CAFE, the best sandwich shop known to man! I go there mostly thursdays because they have my favorite soup on that day only: tomato bisque with their southwest chicken sandwich would be my last supper if I was going to jail.
How do they know me?
When I come in to pick up my order, the same lady hands it to me without even asking what I ordered or whose name it's under. Linh, I blame it on you.
So what did i learn from all of this? Maybe I really should go other places, and NOT BE SO USED TO A ROUTINE.
It's a good thing, life isn't like the game monopoly...otherwise, MY ASS WOULD BE SENT STRAIGHT TO JAIL!
fuck, i always lose that game. damn it. haha
peace, love, and peace and love, and peace and love...and NO MORE REPEATS! (sometimes)
-j
Wednesday, May 6, 2009
"You keep me up at night..."
Oh soy chai latte from starbucks, you are the only thing that keeps me up at night during finals week(s)...and i love you for that.
Sorry linh, jo'ann, daniel, tim, lil sis kathy, jay, and rho class (+others I love)...but when I'm studying, the only thing i want next to me keeping me warm is in a nice paper cup...it doesn't have to be a white paper cup, i don't discriminate.
this will be the only thing im chugging, until may 22nd :(
peace, love, and Caffeine (gallons of it)
-j
Tuesday, May 5, 2009
Onlinebootycall?. com
So pretty much, this is what I think whenever I hear a ROBIN THICKE song...
"I WANT TO FUCK ROBIN THICKE'S VOICE"
There's something that is just so hot about a guy having a really hot voice. That sounded dumb, but you know what I mean...
Granted, Robin Thicke is not visually my type BUT DAMN IS HIS VOICE SEXY! I mean, he could probably work as a phone sex operator or onlinebooty calls...have you ever seen that commercial? It's pretty stupid, but like funny stupid.
Cutting his hair was the best thing he ever did...next to picking up a microphone.
Look at rob and rhi rhi, so cute.
He had me at "hello"
Then it got me thinking of people and their voices...and it made me think of
my guy friends who have hot voices...
a few guys I know could totally work as phone sex operators, but I don't know if they are can really speak as erotically as phone sex operators speak...NOT THAT I WOULD KNOW, I MEAN I DON'T EVER DIAL 1-800-HOT-BOYS hahah
It's awesome when you find a big huge guy and then he ends up having a little kid voice, but when a tiny guy has a sexy voice...then it's like damn you helllla found like a new scientific discovery.
So sorry for the sort blog, but I guess my point is...I don't really know that many guys who have voices that make me melt...
except for this motherfucker right here
...oh jesus, my boo is even playing my future fucking wedding song.
"let's stay together" al green (fuck! i guess it works since im gonna become mrs. thicke...)
peace, love, and EARgasms
-j
"I WANT TO FUCK ROBIN THICKE'S VOICE"
There's something that is just so hot about a guy having a really hot voice. That sounded dumb, but you know what I mean...
Granted, Robin Thicke is not visually my type BUT DAMN IS HIS VOICE SEXY! I mean, he could probably work as a phone sex operator or onlinebooty calls...have you ever seen that commercial? It's pretty stupid, but like funny stupid.
Cutting his hair was the best thing he ever did...next to picking up a microphone.
Look at rob and rhi rhi, so cute.
He had me at "hello"
Then it got me thinking of people and their voices...and it made me think of
my guy friends who have hot voices...
a few guys I know could totally work as phone sex operators, but I don't know if they are can really speak as erotically as phone sex operators speak...NOT THAT I WOULD KNOW, I MEAN I DON'T EVER DIAL 1-800-HOT-BOYS hahah
It's awesome when you find a big huge guy and then he ends up having a little kid voice, but when a tiny guy has a sexy voice...then it's like damn you helllla found like a new scientific discovery.
So sorry for the sort blog, but I guess my point is...I don't really know that many guys who have voices that make me melt...
except for this motherfucker right here
...oh jesus, my boo is even playing my future fucking wedding song.
"let's stay together" al green (fuck! i guess it works since im gonna become mrs. thicke...)
peace, love, and EARgasms
-j
Wednesday, April 29, 2009
Late Night Special
If there's one thing about retail that makes me want to shoot someone in the face, besides idiotic customers who don't know how to lace shoes, it's INVENTORY!
Yes all stores have it, and I'm pretty sure that it gets done all year long and in all hours of the day.
but why the fuck does mine have to be on a monday night from 9:00pm to 1am? Especially on the week that I have 2 essays due...two essays that I have not yet started!?
Freakin' A
Okay well now you know that that is what I mean when I title this blog, LATE NIGHT SPECIAL, no sorry it is not the pornographic sexpedition that it sounds like.
Believe me, i would not be writing that in a public blog.
Anyways so I show up to inventory, not giving a fuck in a big sweater and some jeans and beat up vans shoes, of course. What do you know! one of the laziest coworkers i have is scheduled to work, and now im like FUCK, this is going to last alll fucking night.
For those of you lucky bastards that don't do inventory and don't know what it contains, let me give you a little play by play...
INVENTORY FOR DUMMIES
-you get professional inventory counters to count all the merchandise
-then you re-count all of the merchandise that they counted
-and that tracks what is missing from your store and what you sold in your store, basically it shows how many hoodrats have been stealing from your store and all that jazz.
But here is why it takes forever...
you count everything individually...LACES, SOCKS, A WHOLE LOTTA SHOES...A LOT!
And in a shoe store, there's a lot of fucking little things to count, fucking socks.
But here's what was entertaining during inventory, usually the people who work for inventory (the company) they look like ex criminals OR they look like circus carnies.
Last time during inventory, we had a guy with a babygirl tat on his neck...THUG LIFE!
This time around, all of the inventory people seemed normal, hell they were all pushing 50...except for one pair.
Let me introduce you to these fine people of society...
There was my favorite, the lady who literally sounded like she wanted to stab herself. She would sigh during almost every thing she had to count, and whenever there was a lot to count, she would whisper things like
"Jesus christ!"
"Oh my god!"
"Goddamnit"
"Ughhhhh"
but she would whisper it, which made it ironic...a loud whisper?
Plus I truly did feel bad for her, they had her counting all of the socks and the friggin shoe laces, i had to re-count the shoe laces...THERE WERE 317 IN BACKSTOCK.
Just seeing her complain the whole night was entertaining enough, "I feel you girl, I feel you."
Then there was the youngest girl who was probably around 27, who kept asking for cigarettes...her dialogue exactly
"Garret, you know what I don't have? Cigarettes."
"You know what I want, cigarettes."
"I really want a cigarette"
"We have a 10 min break, I really need a cigarette"
Now personally, I don't smoke cigarettes, but in the case of inventory all night, I would've smoked at least 2 packs.
So the clock was ticking and it hit 1am and I was like, HOLY SHIT! I CAN CLOCK OUT. Then my manager said, JENN CAN YOU STAY UNTIL 1:30. fuck my life, yeah.
I know what you asses are thinking, you're thinking...1:30 am that's nothing! I usually don't sleep till 3 am.
This is what I say to you
fuck you then
I never get any sleep
i work 33 hours this week
have two essays due
a choir performance
17 units
and 1 finger showing
eff you
i enjoy the little bit of sleep that i do get, so if 1:30am is nothing to you, you can suck it cause if it were up to me...I'd be sleeping 9 hrs a night.
So here's the kicker, it's 1:22am on the clock and are only halfway done with counting all the shit in the store...my manager then says I NEED AT LEAST TWO OF YOU GUYS TO STAY ANOTHER HALF HOUR. i plead my case, tell him how out of my 5 coworkers, I HAVE TO GET UP TOMORROW MORNING AND WORK and they dont.
IM FREED
thank you jesus aka josh the manager
so that was my tale of inventory, it's nothing epic or spectacular but i guess i really wanted to showcase that one really funny lady who kept cursing up a storm and using god's name in vain like it was going out of style.
I hope she's there for inventory next year.
peace, love, and fucking inventory
jenn
ohh p.s. my friend got a job at jamba juice and was telling me that her manager does inventory and complaining about how 33 PRETZELS ARE MISSING! if i worked at jamba juice, (again) i wouldnt be stealing pretzels....i'd be stealing the boosts! haha
Yes all stores have it, and I'm pretty sure that it gets done all year long and in all hours of the day.
but why the fuck does mine have to be on a monday night from 9:00pm to 1am? Especially on the week that I have 2 essays due...two essays that I have not yet started!?
Freakin' A
Okay well now you know that that is what I mean when I title this blog, LATE NIGHT SPECIAL, no sorry it is not the pornographic sexpedition that it sounds like.
Believe me, i would not be writing that in a public blog.
Anyways so I show up to inventory, not giving a fuck in a big sweater and some jeans and beat up vans shoes, of course. What do you know! one of the laziest coworkers i have is scheduled to work, and now im like FUCK, this is going to last alll fucking night.
For those of you lucky bastards that don't do inventory and don't know what it contains, let me give you a little play by play...
INVENTORY FOR DUMMIES
-you get professional inventory counters to count all the merchandise
-then you re-count all of the merchandise that they counted
-and that tracks what is missing from your store and what you sold in your store, basically it shows how many hoodrats have been stealing from your store and all that jazz.
But here is why it takes forever...
you count everything individually...LACES, SOCKS, A WHOLE LOTTA SHOES...A LOT!
And in a shoe store, there's a lot of fucking little things to count, fucking socks.
But here's what was entertaining during inventory, usually the people who work for inventory (the company) they look like ex criminals OR they look like circus carnies.
Last time during inventory, we had a guy with a babygirl tat on his neck...THUG LIFE!
This time around, all of the inventory people seemed normal, hell they were all pushing 50...except for one pair.
Let me introduce you to these fine people of society...
There was my favorite, the lady who literally sounded like she wanted to stab herself. She would sigh during almost every thing she had to count, and whenever there was a lot to count, she would whisper things like
"Jesus christ!"
"Oh my god!"
"Goddamnit"
"Ughhhhh"
but she would whisper it, which made it ironic...a loud whisper?
Plus I truly did feel bad for her, they had her counting all of the socks and the friggin shoe laces, i had to re-count the shoe laces...THERE WERE 317 IN BACKSTOCK.
Just seeing her complain the whole night was entertaining enough, "I feel you girl, I feel you."
Then there was the youngest girl who was probably around 27, who kept asking for cigarettes...her dialogue exactly
"Garret, you know what I don't have? Cigarettes."
"You know what I want, cigarettes."
"I really want a cigarette"
"We have a 10 min break, I really need a cigarette"
Now personally, I don't smoke cigarettes, but in the case of inventory all night, I would've smoked at least 2 packs.
So the clock was ticking and it hit 1am and I was like, HOLY SHIT! I CAN CLOCK OUT. Then my manager said, JENN CAN YOU STAY UNTIL 1:30. fuck my life, yeah.
I know what you asses are thinking, you're thinking...1:30 am that's nothing! I usually don't sleep till 3 am.
This is what I say to you
fuck you then
I never get any sleep
i work 33 hours this week
have two essays due
a choir performance
17 units
and 1 finger showing
eff you
i enjoy the little bit of sleep that i do get, so if 1:30am is nothing to you, you can suck it cause if it were up to me...I'd be sleeping 9 hrs a night.
So here's the kicker, it's 1:22am on the clock and are only halfway done with counting all the shit in the store...my manager then says I NEED AT LEAST TWO OF YOU GUYS TO STAY ANOTHER HALF HOUR. i plead my case, tell him how out of my 5 coworkers, I HAVE TO GET UP TOMORROW MORNING AND WORK and they dont.
IM FREED
thank you jesus aka josh the manager
so that was my tale of inventory, it's nothing epic or spectacular but i guess i really wanted to showcase that one really funny lady who kept cursing up a storm and using god's name in vain like it was going out of style.
I hope she's there for inventory next year.
peace, love, and fucking inventory
jenn
ohh p.s. my friend got a job at jamba juice and was telling me that her manager does inventory and complaining about how 33 PRETZELS ARE MISSING! if i worked at jamba juice, (again) i wouldnt be stealing pretzels....i'd be stealing the boosts! haha
Thursday, April 23, 2009
My station on Pandora reaks of adele, norah, jones, and corinne bailey rae...
This is probably the most honest blog that I will ever write. Possibly because my blog is called, JENNTERTAINMENT, not FEELINGS AND SHIT.
You're used to my blogs making you crack at least one smile, or at least I hope.
But lately I guess you can say I'm stuck in A BIG ASS FUCKING RUT.
I don't know if my cup is half full or half empty.
For god's sake, I'm on pandora live radio and the station I'm listening to on repeat harbors all of the songs that women in their late 30s listen to...
give me some adele, corinne bailey rae, some norah jones...and in this case, a white wine spritzer and a fucking blanket by the fire.
Usually spring semester goes by fast, which is a good thing especially since I've been missing that feeling.
I somehow lost that feeling of unconditional butterflies, the feeling of that pit of your stomach getting bigger as the dip of the rollercoaster is getting closer, the feeling of not being able to sleep because you know something really good is gonna occur as soon as the sun comes up like your birthday or an old friend flying in tomorrow morning disappeared.
Somehow in this sunny california weather, I'm in a gray area.
No, it's not all about the fact that I still haven't found mr.right...I found a guy who seems right but now I think he's gay.
On another note I guess you can say that I lost the feeling of excitement. My life pretty much morphed into work and school and the occasional hangout with friends or the occasional frat party.
Surprises used to happen more than they do now, everything is predictable, everything is on schedule, everything has become so mundane.
I do love a lot of aspects of my life, don't get me wrong...but I just need that extra SOMETHING.
What song is playing now? ohhh another depressing one
"another rainy day" by corinne bailey rae...how coincidental.
Spring has sprung but I'm still right where I was just this past winter.
I think I need an emergency vacation somewhere, make that a spontaneous vacation...everyone is entitled to one, my boss will understand.
Then there's people I think of who are perfectly happy with where they are in life today.
My co-worker ...WAIT A MINUTE!
PANDORA.YOU ARE READING MY EFFIN MIND!
THE SONG THAT IS CURRENTLY PLAYING:
"HELP YOURSELF" BY AMY WINEHOUSE
freaking A, amy...you're right.
Let me get back to my story, my coworker is 29, works as an assistant manager at my retail store and lives in a studio apt with his girlfriend AND HE IS CRAZY CONTENT WITH HIS LIFE.
He's probably one of the very few coworkers of mine who is ALWAYS in a good mood at work...he isn't another disgruntled employee who thinks they don't make enough.
I wanna be more like him.
So what's going on in my head right now,
SAME SHIT, DIFFERENT WEEK.
That's my life on rotation right now, I need to switch it up....
whether it means, joining the african student organization who like science, or it means getting yet another haircut, or if it means taking a sabatical from the friends i see everyday.
I mapped out a TO DO list for the rest of this semester, here goes
Fuck, DUFFY IS PLAYING RIGHT NOW...skip!
Okay, now back to my jams...john mayer, he's no chris carraba...but he'll do.
okay, here's the for real TO DO LIST
1. find a new hobby, that's sociable...
2. possibly start playing my old dusty guitar again and writing new songs
3. get my poli sci grade and stats grade back to PARENT'S STANDARDS
4. hang out with new people! (no offense to my usuals, i love you)
5. find a new activity to do every week (maybe i should buy that aerobics tape)
6. fuck! im doing it, buying FLIRTY GIRL FITNESS and trying that shit out!
7. actually working out and going running with kyle like i always say i will
8. positive thinking x100
9. getting past that guy who was my standards of perfect but not for me
10. making dinner for my family more often (but leaving the dishes to my sisters)
11. try and volunteer at my old elementary school
12. wrap my head around my potential major and keep it there
13. go to the beach once a week starting this saturday
14. take a spontaneous road trip twice a month
15. start going to concerts again, havent been since 2 months ago
16. GET OUT OF THIS RUT, RUN FROM IT, AND HOPE TO NEVER FALL INTO IT AGAIN!
so here it was, FEELINGS AND SHIT, what song is playing?
ohhh pandora, i like...
"melt my heart to stone" adele
hey! i wrote a song called, "melt my heart" when i was 17...man you adele, you steal all of my ideas!
Im not even going to bother proofreading this, so if it sounds like a drunk 38 year old then...i guess it is.
But hopefully you can appreciate the fact that i can write a blog that does demonstrate all 348 feelings that are enclosed in me right now.
12:04 am on a thursday, and i got to shower.
last song playing,
"Can't take my eyes off you" lauryn hill
THAT'S A PRETTY GOOD SONG TO END ON....
peace,
j :]
You're used to my blogs making you crack at least one smile, or at least I hope.
But lately I guess you can say I'm stuck in A BIG ASS FUCKING RUT.
I don't know if my cup is half full or half empty.
For god's sake, I'm on pandora live radio and the station I'm listening to on repeat harbors all of the songs that women in their late 30s listen to...
give me some adele, corinne bailey rae, some norah jones...and in this case, a white wine spritzer and a fucking blanket by the fire.
Usually spring semester goes by fast, which is a good thing especially since I've been missing that feeling.
I somehow lost that feeling of unconditional butterflies, the feeling of that pit of your stomach getting bigger as the dip of the rollercoaster is getting closer, the feeling of not being able to sleep because you know something really good is gonna occur as soon as the sun comes up like your birthday or an old friend flying in tomorrow morning disappeared.
Somehow in this sunny california weather, I'm in a gray area.
No, it's not all about the fact that I still haven't found mr.right...I found a guy who seems right but now I think he's gay.
On another note I guess you can say that I lost the feeling of excitement. My life pretty much morphed into work and school and the occasional hangout with friends or the occasional frat party.
Surprises used to happen more than they do now, everything is predictable, everything is on schedule, everything has become so mundane.
I do love a lot of aspects of my life, don't get me wrong...but I just need that extra SOMETHING.
What song is playing now? ohhh another depressing one
"another rainy day" by corinne bailey rae...how coincidental.
Spring has sprung but I'm still right where I was just this past winter.
I think I need an emergency vacation somewhere, make that a spontaneous vacation...everyone is entitled to one, my boss will understand.
Then there's people I think of who are perfectly happy with where they are in life today.
My co-worker ...WAIT A MINUTE!
PANDORA.YOU ARE READING MY EFFIN MIND!
THE SONG THAT IS CURRENTLY PLAYING:
"HELP YOURSELF" BY AMY WINEHOUSE
freaking A, amy...you're right.
Let me get back to my story, my coworker is 29, works as an assistant manager at my retail store and lives in a studio apt with his girlfriend AND HE IS CRAZY CONTENT WITH HIS LIFE.
He's probably one of the very few coworkers of mine who is ALWAYS in a good mood at work...he isn't another disgruntled employee who thinks they don't make enough.
I wanna be more like him.
So what's going on in my head right now,
SAME SHIT, DIFFERENT WEEK.
That's my life on rotation right now, I need to switch it up....
whether it means, joining the african student organization who like science, or it means getting yet another haircut, or if it means taking a sabatical from the friends i see everyday.
I mapped out a TO DO list for the rest of this semester, here goes
Fuck, DUFFY IS PLAYING RIGHT NOW...skip!
Okay, now back to my jams...john mayer, he's no chris carraba...but he'll do.
okay, here's the for real TO DO LIST
1. find a new hobby, that's sociable...
2. possibly start playing my old dusty guitar again and writing new songs
3. get my poli sci grade and stats grade back to PARENT'S STANDARDS
4. hang out with new people! (no offense to my usuals, i love you)
5. find a new activity to do every week (maybe i should buy that aerobics tape)
6. fuck! im doing it, buying FLIRTY GIRL FITNESS and trying that shit out!
7. actually working out and going running with kyle like i always say i will
8. positive thinking x100
9. getting past that guy who was my standards of perfect but not for me
10. making dinner for my family more often (but leaving the dishes to my sisters)
11. try and volunteer at my old elementary school
12. wrap my head around my potential major and keep it there
13. go to the beach once a week starting this saturday
14. take a spontaneous road trip twice a month
15. start going to concerts again, havent been since 2 months ago
16. GET OUT OF THIS RUT, RUN FROM IT, AND HOPE TO NEVER FALL INTO IT AGAIN!
so here it was, FEELINGS AND SHIT, what song is playing?
ohhh pandora, i like...
"melt my heart to stone" adele
hey! i wrote a song called, "melt my heart" when i was 17...man you adele, you steal all of my ideas!
Im not even going to bother proofreading this, so if it sounds like a drunk 38 year old then...i guess it is.
But hopefully you can appreciate the fact that i can write a blog that does demonstrate all 348 feelings that are enclosed in me right now.
12:04 am on a thursday, and i got to shower.
last song playing,
"Can't take my eyes off you" lauryn hill
THAT'S A PRETTY GOOD SONG TO END ON....
peace,
j :]
Tuesday, April 21, 2009
HAPPY pothead DAY!
So here are some current events that I noticed today...
1) It was excruciatingly hot and I almost melted into a tiny asian puddle. Not good.
2) Guess what? It's national smoke weed everyday -day, also known as the infamous 4/20 and although I should be celebrating cause one of my friends is a dealer and could probably smoke me out...I HAVE TOO MUCH SHIT TO STUDY FOR THIS WEEK.
yeah, better luck tomorrow.
However THE BEST QUOTE THAT I HEARD ALL DAY WAS from my lovely pledge sister, christine. take a bow because you made it into my current events...
Let me set the scene up for you...
We were driving home from something tonight and I was actually dropping her back off at her car at sdsu...
christine: IS THAT WEED?
me: no, that's skunk
christine: it smelled like weed
me: well fuck you obviously havent smoked in a long ass time if you think it smells like weed here, thats motherfucking skunk.
christine: (laughs uncontrollably for literally 6 minutes) I STILL THOUGHT IT WAS WEED.
PLUS! IN ALL OF MY CLASSES THERE WAS A SIGNIFICANT DECRESE OF STUDENTS TODAY, IS IT BECAUSE PEOPLE ARE AT THE BEACH, OR SMOKING OUT? probably both.
hahahaha, isn't she just precious. So although I am not an avid smoker of the green leaves we've all grown to love... I sure do not mind it. People think I'm super ghetto though because I prefer blunts over bongs and pipes...But I don't know, I guess it's that tiny bit of hoodrat in me that likes the blunts
As my drug dealing friend would say, "Blunts are for n!&#@s"
Other current events...PIE ME! My sorority is having a pie auction and I need you putas to come pie me to pay off my fundraising dues...come on! You know you love me...ish. Okay actually, I don't wanna get pied but you can always just donate me money to see me. Just think about it, hey! just really think about it.
Last on current events, bitches need to stop acting entitled to things and acting like their shit don't stink....it's kind of like outkast said, "roses really smell like boo boo"
dont feel like you're entitled to something, otherwise you will get cut. thanks.
on a cheerful note...
<3 jenn
1) It was excruciatingly hot and I almost melted into a tiny asian puddle. Not good.
2) Guess what? It's national smoke weed everyday -day, also known as the infamous 4/20 and although I should be celebrating cause one of my friends is a dealer and could probably smoke me out...I HAVE TOO MUCH SHIT TO STUDY FOR THIS WEEK.
yeah, better luck tomorrow.
However THE BEST QUOTE THAT I HEARD ALL DAY WAS from my lovely pledge sister, christine. take a bow because you made it into my current events...
Let me set the scene up for you...
We were driving home from something tonight and I was actually dropping her back off at her car at sdsu...
christine: IS THAT WEED?
me: no, that's skunk
christine: it smelled like weed
me: well fuck you obviously havent smoked in a long ass time if you think it smells like weed here, thats motherfucking skunk.
christine: (laughs uncontrollably for literally 6 minutes) I STILL THOUGHT IT WAS WEED.
PLUS! IN ALL OF MY CLASSES THERE WAS A SIGNIFICANT DECRESE OF STUDENTS TODAY, IS IT BECAUSE PEOPLE ARE AT THE BEACH, OR SMOKING OUT? probably both.
hahahaha, isn't she just precious. So although I am not an avid smoker of the green leaves we've all grown to love... I sure do not mind it. People think I'm super ghetto though because I prefer blunts over bongs and pipes...But I don't know, I guess it's that tiny bit of hoodrat in me that likes the blunts
As my drug dealing friend would say, "Blunts are for n!&#@s"
Other current events...PIE ME! My sorority is having a pie auction and I need you putas to come pie me to pay off my fundraising dues...come on! You know you love me...ish. Okay actually, I don't wanna get pied but you can always just donate me money to see me. Just think about it, hey! just really think about it.
Last on current events, bitches need to stop acting entitled to things and acting like their shit don't stink....it's kind of like outkast said, "roses really smell like boo boo"
dont feel like you're entitled to something, otherwise you will get cut. thanks.
on a cheerful note...
<3 jenn
Sunday, April 12, 2009
I think that maybe possibly, I'm falling in love with the written word
Lyrics, they make the song...
nowadays it's hard to find songs that have lyrics that are different and that as girly as this sounds...lyrics that are beautiful.
I made a list of my favorite lyrics composed by some of the best artists.
When I do get lyrics tattooed on my body, it's going to be a tough decision because if I honestly tattooed every lyric I ever loved on my body...I would be all words and I would pretty much look like a walking dictionary. People would look at me and say, "Jigga is that chu?" Oh shit it's jenn, my bad" haha
So here are some lyrics that I can listen to ALLL DAY, ERRRRRYDAY!
"Babygirl twist awayyyyy...." anthony green
"All that I have, is 26 dollars and the keys to a cadillac, all I wanna know is, do you wanna come with me?" fenix tx
"Cause I love the way you call me baby, and you take me the way I am" ingrid michaelson
"you could be the book that I read every night...and i know you can't call me on the telephone cause I'm broke but I'd rather be sleeping on rooftops and next to your skin, let me in" jesse barrera
"If it's not too late for coffee, i'll be at your place in ten, we'll hit that all night diner and then we'll seeeee" copeland
"could it be im suffering because ill never give in, won't say that im falling love" corinne bailey rae
"don't stop me now, im having such a good time, im having a ball, don't stop me now...if you wanna have a good time, just give me a call" queen
"what i really wanna know, my baby, what i really wanna say i can't deny, oh it's love that i neeeeeed, my soul will have to wait" sublime
"launced a thousand ships in my heart, so easy" 311
"i couldnt resist him, his eyes were like yours, his hair was the exact shade of brown, hes just not as tall, but i couldnt tell, it was dark and i was lying down...you are everything, he means nothing to me, i cant even remember his name...i was thinking of you when i cammmmme" amy winehouse
"birthdays was the worst days, now we pop champagne when we're thirsty..."biggie
"believe me sweetie, i got enough to feed the needy"biggie
"you used up all your coupons and all you've got left is me, but somehow im full of forgiveness, i guess it's meant to be" no doubt
"strumming my pain with his fingers...killing me softly with his song, killing me softly with his song, telling my whole life with his words..." lauryn hill
"that's my dreamworld, i wanna live in a dream, ohhh the real world just dont feel right, wanna spend my day searching for lost time" robin thicke
"im an addict for dramatics, i confuse the two for love" tbs
"i i i im so in love with you, whatever you wanna do, is all right with me...cause you make me feel so brand new, and i wanna spend my life with you" al green
"love hurts sometimes if you do it right, dont be afraid, pleasure is on the other side..."john legend
"don't like his baggy jeans but imma like whats underneath them" estelle
okay so there's probably 50358289538593285542133041 more lyrics i could post but then it would be 583583059309 pages long, so here are some lyrics that i do love though.
more to come soon
peace, love, and the written word
-j
nowadays it's hard to find songs that have lyrics that are different and that as girly as this sounds...lyrics that are beautiful.
I made a list of my favorite lyrics composed by some of the best artists.
When I do get lyrics tattooed on my body, it's going to be a tough decision because if I honestly tattooed every lyric I ever loved on my body...I would be all words and I would pretty much look like a walking dictionary. People would look at me and say, "Jigga is that chu?" Oh shit it's jenn, my bad" haha
So here are some lyrics that I can listen to ALLL DAY, ERRRRRYDAY!
"Babygirl twist awayyyyy...." anthony green
"All that I have, is 26 dollars and the keys to a cadillac, all I wanna know is, do you wanna come with me?" fenix tx
"Cause I love the way you call me baby, and you take me the way I am" ingrid michaelson
"you could be the book that I read every night...and i know you can't call me on the telephone cause I'm broke but I'd rather be sleeping on rooftops and next to your skin, let me in" jesse barrera
"If it's not too late for coffee, i'll be at your place in ten, we'll hit that all night diner and then we'll seeeee" copeland
"could it be im suffering because ill never give in, won't say that im falling love" corinne bailey rae
"don't stop me now, im having such a good time, im having a ball, don't stop me now...if you wanna have a good time, just give me a call" queen
"what i really wanna know, my baby, what i really wanna say i can't deny, oh it's love that i neeeeeed, my soul will have to wait" sublime
"launced a thousand ships in my heart, so easy" 311
"i couldnt resist him, his eyes were like yours, his hair was the exact shade of brown, hes just not as tall, but i couldnt tell, it was dark and i was lying down...you are everything, he means nothing to me, i cant even remember his name...i was thinking of you when i cammmmme" amy winehouse
"birthdays was the worst days, now we pop champagne when we're thirsty..."biggie
"believe me sweetie, i got enough to feed the needy"biggie
"you used up all your coupons and all you've got left is me, but somehow im full of forgiveness, i guess it's meant to be" no doubt
"strumming my pain with his fingers...killing me softly with his song, killing me softly with his song, telling my whole life with his words..." lauryn hill
"that's my dreamworld, i wanna live in a dream, ohhh the real world just dont feel right, wanna spend my day searching for lost time" robin thicke
"im an addict for dramatics, i confuse the two for love" tbs
"i i i im so in love with you, whatever you wanna do, is all right with me...cause you make me feel so brand new, and i wanna spend my life with you" al green
"love hurts sometimes if you do it right, dont be afraid, pleasure is on the other side..."john legend
"don't like his baggy jeans but imma like whats underneath them" estelle
okay so there's probably 50358289538593285542133041 more lyrics i could post but then it would be 583583059309 pages long, so here are some lyrics that i do love though.
more to come soon
peace, love, and the written word
-j
Thursday, April 9, 2009
Explore SD
My friend once asked me, "Where should I take my friends? They're coming down from Sacramento and I wanna know where to take them in San Diego."
I know what you're thinking, you're thinking..."Uh isn't she from Sd?"
Well actually she is from oceanside, vegas, guam...you name it and she's probably spent a portion of her life there.
Anywhoozels, I contemplated "Where do I like to go in sd?"
So I made a list of some of my favorite hotspots and what you would usually do there...so here goes
1) If you wanna get fucked up and drink reallly goood alcohol but you are not 21...
Go to MIN SOK CHON, it's a little korean restaurant and as long as you have at least 1 person who's 21+ yrs. old, then you can get all the delicious soju you want!
What's soju? REALLY GOOD RICE WINE, BUT YOU TAKE IT AS SHOTS. For example...mango flavored, strawberry, etc.
"Guaranteed to jack you up"
then you go to...
2)J MUSIC STUDIO, which is literally next door and where you can karaoke as loud and drunkily as your little heard desires. PLUS! you can sneak your own snacks and alki in that little place...but be sure to be smart about it. karaoke is probably the best activity when you're sober, drunk, or high.
I PREFER IT SOBER, BELIEVE IT OR NOT! haha
3)Speaking of getting high...
There's a little park in PB that has one of the prettiest views I have ever seen...it's A GOOD MAKE OUT SPOT/getting intoxicated spot/CHILL SPOT WITH FRIENDS...
kate SESSIONS park...sessions, kind of ironic don't you think?
smoke sesh, make out sesh, chill sesh
good times
4)Looking for a little live music? Well I would take my friends to any show that's 10-12 dollars at either Che Cafe by UCSD or Soma because those are just really cool atmospheres and there's always a show on the weekends to check out. It may not be a band you're into, but I guarantee your friends won't mind too much if they're all together.
5)Like a little sun, a little cotton candy, and a little thrill ride?
Well step on over to Belmont Park. Okay, so I know that mission beach is not that nice and let's be honest...there's only about 5 rides at Belmont Park...BUT!
The Great Dipper is infamous! It was my first rollercoaster, and it's just a fun experience. It's free admission, all you have to do is pay for the rides, and the food's decent. All I know is, that rollercoaster may break in about 3 years but it's like a landmark. If you grew up in sd, you rode that coaster at least once.
6)Next, for those who have at least one sweet tooth and are into pretty romantic settings...there's EXTRAORDINARY DESSERTS! It's a little pricey, but it's the best way to end the night. Their chocolate croissant bread pudding is TO DIE FOR, and the rest of their cakes are really rich in texture but delicious nonetheless. If you're a guy wanting to impress a girl...this is where you wanna take her.
7)So there's always a spot that people like to walk along and just enjoy each other's company, SEAPORT VILLAGE is the best spot to just check out the scenery and appreciate the weather. It has cute little shops that no one ever buys anything from (hat shop/hot sauce shop/etc.) and it's just a really adorable spot to have lunch.
8)Then there's the mexican food, and san diego has an abundance of it. Here's a couple places to name a few that are pretty good, authentic, and affordable: senor panchos, el cotixan, vallarta, jv's, valencia's, molcasalsa... just to name a few.
9)For another amazing view/sexy time spot at night....THERE'S MT. SOLEDAD. yeah -yuh, we all know that's where the steamy windows prevail. BUT WITH FRIENDS, IT'S STILL A REALLY FUN AND BEAUTIFUL PLACE TO GO. (Cabrillo monument is nice too)
10) For shopping, take them to THE NICE MALLS aka not ghetto...
fashion valley mall, horton plaza, and plaza bonita would be the best place for purchases.
so hopefully,if you aren't from san diego...you can go to these places and appreciate them.
or if you are from san diego, you should explore a little more and find new places that you can share!
STAY CLASSY SAN DIEGO...
-jenn the tourguide
I know what you're thinking, you're thinking..."Uh isn't she from Sd?"
Well actually she is from oceanside, vegas, guam...you name it and she's probably spent a portion of her life there.
Anywhoozels, I contemplated "Where do I like to go in sd?"
So I made a list of some of my favorite hotspots and what you would usually do there...so here goes
1) If you wanna get fucked up and drink reallly goood alcohol but you are not 21...
Go to MIN SOK CHON, it's a little korean restaurant and as long as you have at least 1 person who's 21+ yrs. old, then you can get all the delicious soju you want!
What's soju? REALLY GOOD RICE WINE, BUT YOU TAKE IT AS SHOTS. For example...mango flavored, strawberry, etc.
"Guaranteed to jack you up"
then you go to...
2)J MUSIC STUDIO, which is literally next door and where you can karaoke as loud and drunkily as your little heard desires. PLUS! you can sneak your own snacks and alki in that little place...but be sure to be smart about it. karaoke is probably the best activity when you're sober, drunk, or high.
I PREFER IT SOBER, BELIEVE IT OR NOT! haha
3)Speaking of getting high...
There's a little park in PB that has one of the prettiest views I have ever seen...it's A GOOD MAKE OUT SPOT/getting intoxicated spot/CHILL SPOT WITH FRIENDS...
kate SESSIONS park...sessions, kind of ironic don't you think?
smoke sesh, make out sesh, chill sesh
good times
4)Looking for a little live music? Well I would take my friends to any show that's 10-12 dollars at either Che Cafe by UCSD or Soma because those are just really cool atmospheres and there's always a show on the weekends to check out. It may not be a band you're into, but I guarantee your friends won't mind too much if they're all together.
5)Like a little sun, a little cotton candy, and a little thrill ride?
Well step on over to Belmont Park. Okay, so I know that mission beach is not that nice and let's be honest...there's only about 5 rides at Belmont Park...BUT!
The Great Dipper is infamous! It was my first rollercoaster, and it's just a fun experience. It's free admission, all you have to do is pay for the rides, and the food's decent. All I know is, that rollercoaster may break in about 3 years but it's like a landmark. If you grew up in sd, you rode that coaster at least once.
6)Next, for those who have at least one sweet tooth and are into pretty romantic settings...there's EXTRAORDINARY DESSERTS! It's a little pricey, but it's the best way to end the night. Their chocolate croissant bread pudding is TO DIE FOR, and the rest of their cakes are really rich in texture but delicious nonetheless. If you're a guy wanting to impress a girl...this is where you wanna take her.
7)So there's always a spot that people like to walk along and just enjoy each other's company, SEAPORT VILLAGE is the best spot to just check out the scenery and appreciate the weather. It has cute little shops that no one ever buys anything from (hat shop/hot sauce shop/etc.) and it's just a really adorable spot to have lunch.
8)Then there's the mexican food, and san diego has an abundance of it. Here's a couple places to name a few that are pretty good, authentic, and affordable: senor panchos, el cotixan, vallarta, jv's, valencia's, molcasalsa... just to name a few.
9)For another amazing view/sexy time spot at night....THERE'S MT. SOLEDAD. yeah -yuh, we all know that's where the steamy windows prevail. BUT WITH FRIENDS, IT'S STILL A REALLY FUN AND BEAUTIFUL PLACE TO GO. (Cabrillo monument is nice too)
10) For shopping, take them to THE NICE MALLS aka not ghetto...
fashion valley mall, horton plaza, and plaza bonita would be the best place for purchases.
so hopefully,if you aren't from san diego...you can go to these places and appreciate them.
or if you are from san diego, you should explore a little more and find new places that you can share!
STAY CLASSY SAN DIEGO...
-jenn the tourguide
Wednesday, April 8, 2009
This Charming Man
First off, sorry I have not posted anything yet...but spring break happened and then just right around the corner...MIDTERMS GALORE!
As of right now I have a new obsession, yes I know that I have a lot....like red velvet cupcakes,deep deep v-necks, and oh that's right music!
THANKS TO MY BOO BOO SANDRA, I HAVE A NEW MUSICIAN INFATUATION.
Yes Sandra, I am giving you crazy mad props because his voice is amazing, and yes you know who I'm referring to...RICHARD TRAN!
If there's one thing that's the most attractive about a guy, it's his singing and musical ability and richard tran has got both.
How did I discover him...
Once upon a time I was in the library "studying" with Sandra and we were bored so we were looking up youtube videos on her ipod touch...then she said
"Have you ever heard of Richard Tran?"
And that's when it started...
So it's approx 11:38pm on a wednesday night and I am attempting to do my math xHELL homework, but instead I am watching his videos.
and ooooohhhing and awwwwing, cause his voice and musical talent is undeniable.
Yes Sandra, you made me a fan....fuck.
Now I will be going on youtube more often and neglecting important things I could be doing...like my homework right now.
Oh well,
So just so you guys don't think I'm crazy, check out this video of Richard doing his thang, and girls...you'll understand.
-jenn
As of right now I have a new obsession, yes I know that I have a lot....like red velvet cupcakes,deep deep v-necks, and oh that's right music!
THANKS TO MY BOO BOO SANDRA, I HAVE A NEW MUSICIAN INFATUATION.
Yes Sandra, I am giving you crazy mad props because his voice is amazing, and yes you know who I'm referring to...RICHARD TRAN!
If there's one thing that's the most attractive about a guy, it's his singing and musical ability and richard tran has got both.
How did I discover him...
Once upon a time I was in the library "studying" with Sandra and we were bored so we were looking up youtube videos on her ipod touch...then she said
"Have you ever heard of Richard Tran?"
And that's when it started...
So it's approx 11:38pm on a wednesday night and I am attempting to do my math xHELL homework, but instead I am watching his videos.
and ooooohhhing and awwwwing, cause his voice and musical talent is undeniable.
Yes Sandra, you made me a fan....fuck.
Now I will be going on youtube more often and neglecting important things I could be doing...like my homework right now.
Oh well,
So just so you guys don't think I'm crazy, check out this video of Richard doing his thang, and girls...you'll understand.
-jenn
Thursday, March 26, 2009
"Jasmine has a penis"
So for the past two days, I've gathered a list of really ridiculously funny quotes that I've said, my friends have said, and some I've heard from T.V.
Seriously, if you had to guess which quotes were mine, and which belonged to my friends or the television set...you'd be very surprised.
To think, these quotes were a collection of two days. Life can be realllllly fucking funny sometimes.
"There's chocolate in there...SURPRISE, MOTHERFUCKA!"
"I have a boner for him."
-"So you have a penis, haha Jasmine has a penis, Jasmine has a penis!"
"Show your pubes, babe, show your pubes"
"I'll take a cock ring, one cock ring please"
"...I love porn"
"Stop! I'm gonna throw you away."
"Whoo hoo! I got your businessss!"
"And my dick runs deep, sooo deep, so deep put her ass to sleep"
"So what was up with that guy in the movie, the one that's blue and naked?"
"Let's narrow down the cupcake choices....to 6!"
"This nigga's wearing skinny jeans and a buttplug"
"So far for spring break I ate carne asada fries five times"
"Daniel, you're not white! you're not white! you're not white!"
-"We're gonna have to go on the Maury povich show..."
-"Then he's gonna open the envelope and say, 'We have the results, Daniel..you are NOT WHITE'
"That's what happens when you're high-carne asada fries"
"There were legit asian gangsters at the taco shop, we were sincerely scared, they had rice rockets, so we left."
"STOP TRYING TO TOUCH ME! I'm ticklish."
"Noooooo...I'm not gonna put it in you."
"Time for body rolls"
"This was Andrew's ringtone in 6th grade (ginuwine's "Pony" song)
-"I didn't even have a cell phone in 6th grade"
"Sitting here flossing, peeping yo steelo"
"He's taking too long to make the drinks, you know his ass is back there texting!"
"I wanna learn how to hula, except my skirt is gonna be shorter"
"As long as there's balls in your mouth, you're happy"
"You look like you're having a tourettes attack"
"Remember when Ashley used to pretend to have an epilepsy attack during recess..."
-"That was soooo funny"
"Chinese + white = cat"
"You wanna be Ms.Jupiter's daughter for halloween? That's like saying you want permanent cameltoe"
"She didn't go get a refill...you know she's just drinking it all by herself in the bathrooom."
"This nigga's looking like love"
So those are all of the crazy sayings that I've literally been playing on repeat this whole week. So if you happen to see me in class and I all of a sudden bust out in laughter...you'll know why. It's like sarah tran said...
"SURPRISE, MOTHERFUCKA!"
love,
penis-less ( haha jasmine)
Seriously, if you had to guess which quotes were mine, and which belonged to my friends or the television set...you'd be very surprised.
To think, these quotes were a collection of two days. Life can be realllllly fucking funny sometimes.
"There's chocolate in there...SURPRISE, MOTHERFUCKA!"
"I have a boner for him."
-"So you have a penis, haha Jasmine has a penis, Jasmine has a penis!"
"Show your pubes, babe, show your pubes"
"I'll take a cock ring, one cock ring please"
"...I love porn"
"Stop! I'm gonna throw you away."
"Whoo hoo! I got your businessss!"
"And my dick runs deep, sooo deep, so deep put her ass to sleep"
"So what was up with that guy in the movie, the one that's blue and naked?"
"Let's narrow down the cupcake choices....to 6!"
"This nigga's wearing skinny jeans and a buttplug"
"So far for spring break I ate carne asada fries five times"
"Daniel, you're not white! you're not white! you're not white!"
-"We're gonna have to go on the Maury povich show..."
-"Then he's gonna open the envelope and say, 'We have the results, Daniel..you are NOT WHITE'
"That's what happens when you're high-carne asada fries"
"There were legit asian gangsters at the taco shop, we were sincerely scared, they had rice rockets, so we left."
"STOP TRYING TO TOUCH ME! I'm ticklish."
"Noooooo...I'm not gonna put it in you."
"Time for body rolls"
"This was Andrew's ringtone in 6th grade (ginuwine's "Pony" song)
-"I didn't even have a cell phone in 6th grade"
"Sitting here flossing, peeping yo steelo"
"He's taking too long to make the drinks, you know his ass is back there texting!"
"I wanna learn how to hula, except my skirt is gonna be shorter"
"As long as there's balls in your mouth, you're happy"
"You look like you're having a tourettes attack"
"Remember when Ashley used to pretend to have an epilepsy attack during recess..."
-"That was soooo funny"
"Chinese + white = cat"
"You wanna be Ms.Jupiter's daughter for halloween? That's like saying you want permanent cameltoe"
"She didn't go get a refill...you know she's just drinking it all by herself in the bathrooom."
"This nigga's looking like love"
So those are all of the crazy sayings that I've literally been playing on repeat this whole week. So if you happen to see me in class and I all of a sudden bust out in laughter...you'll know why. It's like sarah tran said...
"SURPRISE, MOTHERFUCKA!"
love,
penis-less ( haha jasmine)
Wednesday, March 18, 2009
Poster Child for F MY LIFE
Today I woke up super tired. I literally felt like I ran a marathon for every disease that there was...the sad thing is, I didn't. I am just exhausted from work and school, work and school, and ladies and gentlemen...work and school.
I snoozed my alarm three times, which is a record for me. It took me forever to get dressed because the weather nowadays is soooo crazy! Hot and cold, like we're in a Katy Perry song.
Found my outfit,which I still had problems with. But it's like what I like to say, "Everyday is a fashion show". So it pretty much just meant I wore a cute little (emphasis on little) skirt...and that's it. Yeah I'm being serious, just a skirt with no top. Okay, it was a complete outfit.
Got to school a little later than I had intended...and only had about 40 minutes to study for my stats quiz. Which fucked me, I got fucked by my stats quiz and I didn't even use protection. (I'm indicating that I would have cheated...come on you nasties, get your head out of the gutter) But I can't cheat because I REALLY AM THAT KID WHO IS MOST LIKELY TO GET CAUGHT, IT'S THE STORY OF MY LIFE AND I'VE COME TO ACCEPT IT...sort of.
After getting fucked by a quiz...I went to go study for my other test...MUSIC! which will soon later also mess me up. I had every intention on studying and being a good girl...but I hella pulled a Rihanna and got beat up by myspace and facebook and music and not studying at all.
As usual the test was really hard, it was so hard that I was pretty much crying on the inside while the song "i'm goin down" by mary j. blige (my homegirl) played in my head. You would think that someone who loves music like really loves music would be good in a music test...WRONG.
Then I had to go to the music concert that accompanied that class and as usual I was half into it, half asleep.
I think I'm getting too old, I used to love concerts...i would go to a concert every week with my sisters, my friends, MY O.G. ZOMBIE CONCERT CREW (it's a long story about the title). But lately, I'm not into it. Oh yeah that's right...it's because the fucking NO DOUBT/ PARAMORE SHOW GOT SOLD OUT IN ABOUT 5 MINUTES!
FUCK MY LIFE
but I have seen a lot of good/okay/eh? people in concert...let's name a few
john legend (most recent)
cypress hill (ganja fest)
98 degrees (dont laugh, i was like 9)
gatsbys american dream (favorite band ever, seen them 10+ times)
interpol (2 in the same year, yeeee)
talib kweli (might have spelled it wrong, but the show was just right)
the sound of animals fighting/ my boo anthony green (best vocalist besides nic)
paramore
say anything
gym class heroes
the used
estelle
my chemical romance
....etc etc etc etc etc I HAVE YET TO SEE MY BOO ELTON JOHN IN CONCERT!
crap, i dont know why but im forgetting a lot of people ive seen.
i have a notebook that has all the ticket stubs from concerts and stuff like that in it. its the size of the GOBLET OF FIRE. so maybe i am getting old if i keep falling asleep at shows...or perhaps i just need to have one day where i sleep for 598503 hours to get my sleep cycle back on track.
...all i know is that im gonna get my swerve on from my bed tonight, meaning im sleeping at around 11 tonight at the latest!
i cannot afford to bomb my next stats or music test, I REFUSE TO GET FUCKED BY INANIMATE OBJECTS!
till next time
lets hope i get into my recluse study mode but still get at least 7 hours of sleep a night...yeah right.
<3 j
I snoozed my alarm three times, which is a record for me. It took me forever to get dressed because the weather nowadays is soooo crazy! Hot and cold, like we're in a Katy Perry song.
Found my outfit,which I still had problems with. But it's like what I like to say, "Everyday is a fashion show". So it pretty much just meant I wore a cute little (emphasis on little) skirt...and that's it. Yeah I'm being serious, just a skirt with no top. Okay, it was a complete outfit.
Got to school a little later than I had intended...and only had about 40 minutes to study for my stats quiz. Which fucked me, I got fucked by my stats quiz and I didn't even use protection. (I'm indicating that I would have cheated...come on you nasties, get your head out of the gutter) But I can't cheat because I REALLY AM THAT KID WHO IS MOST LIKELY TO GET CAUGHT, IT'S THE STORY OF MY LIFE AND I'VE COME TO ACCEPT IT...sort of.
After getting fucked by a quiz...I went to go study for my other test...MUSIC! which will soon later also mess me up. I had every intention on studying and being a good girl...but I hella pulled a Rihanna and got beat up by myspace and facebook and music and not studying at all.
As usual the test was really hard, it was so hard that I was pretty much crying on the inside while the song "i'm goin down" by mary j. blige (my homegirl) played in my head. You would think that someone who loves music like really loves music would be good in a music test...WRONG.
Then I had to go to the music concert that accompanied that class and as usual I was half into it, half asleep.
I think I'm getting too old, I used to love concerts...i would go to a concert every week with my sisters, my friends, MY O.G. ZOMBIE CONCERT CREW (it's a long story about the title). But lately, I'm not into it. Oh yeah that's right...it's because the fucking NO DOUBT/ PARAMORE SHOW GOT SOLD OUT IN ABOUT 5 MINUTES!
FUCK MY LIFE
but I have seen a lot of good/okay/eh? people in concert...let's name a few
john legend (most recent)
cypress hill (ganja fest)
98 degrees (dont laugh, i was like 9)
gatsbys american dream (favorite band ever, seen them 10+ times)
interpol (2 in the same year, yeeee)
talib kweli (might have spelled it wrong, but the show was just right)
the sound of animals fighting/ my boo anthony green (best vocalist besides nic)
paramore
say anything
gym class heroes
the used
estelle
my chemical romance
....etc etc etc etc etc I HAVE YET TO SEE MY BOO ELTON JOHN IN CONCERT!
crap, i dont know why but im forgetting a lot of people ive seen.
i have a notebook that has all the ticket stubs from concerts and stuff like that in it. its the size of the GOBLET OF FIRE. so maybe i am getting old if i keep falling asleep at shows...or perhaps i just need to have one day where i sleep for 598503 hours to get my sleep cycle back on track.
...all i know is that im gonna get my swerve on from my bed tonight, meaning im sleeping at around 11 tonight at the latest!
i cannot afford to bomb my next stats or music test, I REFUSE TO GET FUCKED BY INANIMATE OBJECTS!
till next time
lets hope i get into my recluse study mode but still get at least 7 hours of sleep a night...yeah right.
<3 j
Sunday, March 15, 2009
Friday, 1:00 pm
So those of you who know me, know that I am THE HOPELESS ROMANTIC...which can be a good and a bad thing.
Mostly a bad thing since, for the most part chivalry is DEAD.
For the past 4 semesters of college I did realized that I enjoy my FALL classes 100 times more than my spring classes and this year hadn't changed my opinion so much...until..
DUN DUN DUN
THE BEST LOOKING GUY/ COULD BE A MODEL/ JUST MY TYPE PHYSICALLY stepped into my MWF 1:00 class.
He clearly knows what he's doing because jigga is always dressing to please.
For example... here is one gorgeous outfit that he wore to class, and yes I know that my type in men is really different from others but nonetheless, here is the heavenly description...
WHITE COLLARED SHIRT WITH THE SLEEVES ROLLED UP
ACCOMPANIED BY A GRAY VEST, WORN OPEN
WITH A RED AND BLACK SCARF
AND BLACK SKINNY JEANS!
I MEAN COME ON
i melt
i die
i wish he was...
SINGLE
yes...here is the downfall ladies and gentlemen.
jigga is dating this girl that was in my math class last semester.
Yes I know, I literally am the leper of love. Every guy that I think is perfect for me, soon becomes untouchable. Besides his clothing sense being PHENOMENOL, his face is definitely model status. Not cheesy, aberzombie & bitch style but just really attractive...even with his scruff.
Anywhozels, as sad as I was...which is everytime I walk into that class and see his face...I learned to move on. In doing so I wrote a little poem that is dedicated to my Friday, 1:00 cutie. If she ever unleashes you...you know where to find me.
"So you stood
and I smiled
and we kept this cycle
on for awhile
never asking for my name
and i laughed as you stood
in your battle stance
looking as good as one could get
but i stopped,
asked around
and i knew that you
would've given me a false
description
because of course,
someone else launched a thousand ships
in your eyes
it led to our demise
our almost touch that allows my heart
to race until tomorrow
but summer fades into winter
and you realize who he's into
a day late
unrequited fate
it all comes down to you..."
-Jenilli jenilli jenilli
by yours truly,
Hope you enjoyed that little poem, as sappy as it sounds.
Maybe on monday (tomorrow) he'll be wearing an even cuter outfit.
LURKER? no
INFATUATED? hell yes
till next time,
<3j
Mostly a bad thing since, for the most part chivalry is DEAD.
For the past 4 semesters of college I did realized that I enjoy my FALL classes 100 times more than my spring classes and this year hadn't changed my opinion so much...until..
DUN DUN DUN
THE BEST LOOKING GUY/ COULD BE A MODEL/ JUST MY TYPE PHYSICALLY stepped into my MWF 1:00 class.
He clearly knows what he's doing because jigga is always dressing to please.
For example... here is one gorgeous outfit that he wore to class, and yes I know that my type in men is really different from others but nonetheless, here is the heavenly description...
WHITE COLLARED SHIRT WITH THE SLEEVES ROLLED UP
ACCOMPANIED BY A GRAY VEST, WORN OPEN
WITH A RED AND BLACK SCARF
AND BLACK SKINNY JEANS!
I MEAN COME ON
i melt
i die
i wish he was...
SINGLE
yes...here is the downfall ladies and gentlemen.
jigga is dating this girl that was in my math class last semester.
Yes I know, I literally am the leper of love. Every guy that I think is perfect for me, soon becomes untouchable. Besides his clothing sense being PHENOMENOL, his face is definitely model status. Not cheesy, aberzombie & bitch style but just really attractive...even with his scruff.
Anywhozels, as sad as I was...which is everytime I walk into that class and see his face...I learned to move on. In doing so I wrote a little poem that is dedicated to my Friday, 1:00 cutie. If she ever unleashes you...you know where to find me.
"So you stood
and I smiled
and we kept this cycle
on for awhile
never asking for my name
and i laughed as you stood
in your battle stance
looking as good as one could get
but i stopped,
asked around
and i knew that you
would've given me a false
description
because of course,
someone else launched a thousand ships
in your eyes
it led to our demise
our almost touch that allows my heart
to race until tomorrow
but summer fades into winter
and you realize who he's into
a day late
unrequited fate
it all comes down to you..."
-Jenilli jenilli jenilli
by yours truly,
Hope you enjoyed that little poem, as sappy as it sounds.
Maybe on monday (tomorrow) he'll be wearing an even cuter outfit.
LURKER? no
INFATUATED? hell yes
till next time,
<3j
Tuesday, March 10, 2009
...Heard it from the GREEKvine
So many of you who actually know me should know that I am part of the Greek family, yes I am in a sorority.
Although there are many perks in being in a sorority and knowing a lot of new people and networking, there is one disadvantage in it...
EVERYONE KNOWS YOUR SHIT!
So keep your mouth closed or write it in a diary.
Sometimes it is fun hearing about some juicy gossip that travels through the night and ends up on the table for a lunch conversation. However, sometimes enough is enough and people just need to slowly gravitate towards people who are not greek affiliated.
I know that if the only friends I had were from my sorority and fraternities, I would probably pull my hair out. I love a good amount of people from greek organizations, but sometimes you just need time to relax with people who can talk about different and exciting subjects.
Maybe it would be a good idea to hook up with someone at a designated spot outside of the party? That way people would not be able to chatter about your sexcapades...but then there's always the nosy ones.
The nosy ones are the people who make it their duty to point out who is missing from the party and link them to an imaginary hook up. Maybe they just left the party to get fish tacos?
It's like a breath of fresh air when I see old high school friends because it makes conversations last so much longer. Don't get me wrong, I love being greek and I think it's cool that people know so much about me...TO A CERTAIN EXTENT.
Truth is, people are so much more intriguing when they're a mystery. When you do find out that he's a manwhore...what's the fun in that? Oh yeah that's right, you avoid his genital herpes when you do know.
Oh so that's what that was on his lips?
So I guess when it boils down past all the bullshit, if you do not want people knowing all about you...just do things a little more discretely and please try to not share too much about someone else without their permission.
If anyone ever spreads a nasty rumor about you that they heard through the GREEKvine, then that's when you bust out the line...
"Bitch, you don't know my life!"
xoxo
not so into gossip...girl
(but I do love the show!)
Although there are many perks in being in a sorority and knowing a lot of new people and networking, there is one disadvantage in it...
EVERYONE KNOWS YOUR SHIT!
So keep your mouth closed or write it in a diary.
Sometimes it is fun hearing about some juicy gossip that travels through the night and ends up on the table for a lunch conversation. However, sometimes enough is enough and people just need to slowly gravitate towards people who are not greek affiliated.
I know that if the only friends I had were from my sorority and fraternities, I would probably pull my hair out. I love a good amount of people from greek organizations, but sometimes you just need time to relax with people who can talk about different and exciting subjects.
Maybe it would be a good idea to hook up with someone at a designated spot outside of the party? That way people would not be able to chatter about your sexcapades...but then there's always the nosy ones.
The nosy ones are the people who make it their duty to point out who is missing from the party and link them to an imaginary hook up. Maybe they just left the party to get fish tacos?
It's like a breath of fresh air when I see old high school friends because it makes conversations last so much longer. Don't get me wrong, I love being greek and I think it's cool that people know so much about me...TO A CERTAIN EXTENT.
Truth is, people are so much more intriguing when they're a mystery. When you do find out that he's a manwhore...what's the fun in that? Oh yeah that's right, you avoid his genital herpes when you do know.
Oh so that's what that was on his lips?
So I guess when it boils down past all the bullshit, if you do not want people knowing all about you...just do things a little more discretely and please try to not share too much about someone else without their permission.
If anyone ever spreads a nasty rumor about you that they heard through the GREEKvine, then that's when you bust out the line...
"Bitch, you don't know my life!"
xoxo
not so into gossip...girl
(but I do love the show!)
Sunday, March 8, 2009
www.DUH .com/shoeEtiquette
So as many of you darlings know, who actually know me...I'm a floor supervisor/manager at this "high end" (yeah right) name brand shoe company....yeee yah get money money!
Anywhoozels, there are simple rules that I wish fuckers would learn to follow when coming in my store and I swear that if you did, you would be the perfect customer...but unfortunately there are fucking morons who still do not have the right etiquette in my store.
Listen closley kiddos...
1) Don't ever come into my store and ask if we have converse, or DCs...look at the outside of the store, does it look like it says "Journeys"? no, motherfucka, no.
2) Don't try to try on the display shoe with yo jenky ass dark ass rainbow sandal wearing toes! Here's a hint for you...if you're a female and your shoe size is bigger than 7...don't try on the display, it's NOT YOUR SIZE! For men, it's anything bigger than a 9.5, it won't fucking fit you...so don't be dumb.
3) Don't look in the store and ask for a shoe that you do not see. For example: "Do you have purple high tops?" This is not fucking in-n-out burger, jigga there ain't no secret menu! We don't have hidden stock in the back or shoe cobblers making shoes 24/7, this is not the keebler workshop.
4) If we do not carry your size, don't give us attitude. This is not costco, there is no bulk.
5) Throw away your own trash, DO NOT GIVE ME A DRINK THAT IS HALF FULL OF COFFEE AND ASK ME TO THROW IT AWAY IN MY TINY ASS TRASHCAN BEHIND THE REGISTER WHEN THE TRASHCAN IS 6 FT AWAY OUTSIDE.
6) Keep your kids on leashes...okay that was harsh. DONT LET THEM WALK AROUND FUCKING UP THE STORE.
7) If the mall closes at 9:00pm and you try and walk into my store on a night I'm closing around 8:53pm...PUT ON YOUR BOXING GLOVES.
8)Don't try and ask for a discount on a shoe because there's one tiny little detail on it that's microscopic...unless you're friends with inspector fucking gadget, I'm 100% positive that no one would notice it or even care. P.S. we rarely give discounts, unless something really is wrong with the shoe.
9) This is NOT A KICK IT SPOT, do not just come in and sit on the benches and try on shoes because your mom is late from picking yo ass and your little mallrat friends up.
10) IF YOU EVER EVER TRY TO STEAL FROM MY STORE, I WILL CHASE YOU ALL THE WAY TO TJ, COMPRENDE?
So I'm glad that we got all of this cleared up, hopefully I will not see this happen...especially if you are reading this blog right now. I swear, we're not aggressive at my store at all, in fact if we talk about a customer....it's usually in the back where the shoes are. Just know that we do appreciate your purchases and hope you come back soon...BUT PULL A HO MOVE LIKE ANY OF THE FOLLOWING LISTED UP THERE, AND YOU WILL BE ESCORTED OUT (by my foot up your ass)
peace, love, and shoes
<3jenilla
Anywhoozels, there are simple rules that I wish fuckers would learn to follow when coming in my store and I swear that if you did, you would be the perfect customer...but unfortunately there are fucking morons who still do not have the right etiquette in my store.
Listen closley kiddos...
1) Don't ever come into my store and ask if we have converse, or DCs...look at the outside of the store, does it look like it says "Journeys"? no, motherfucka, no.
2) Don't try to try on the display shoe with yo jenky ass dark ass rainbow sandal wearing toes! Here's a hint for you...if you're a female and your shoe size is bigger than 7...don't try on the display, it's NOT YOUR SIZE! For men, it's anything bigger than a 9.5, it won't fucking fit you...so don't be dumb.
3) Don't look in the store and ask for a shoe that you do not see. For example: "Do you have purple high tops?" This is not fucking in-n-out burger, jigga there ain't no secret menu! We don't have hidden stock in the back or shoe cobblers making shoes 24/7, this is not the keebler workshop.
4) If we do not carry your size, don't give us attitude. This is not costco, there is no bulk.
5) Throw away your own trash, DO NOT GIVE ME A DRINK THAT IS HALF FULL OF COFFEE AND ASK ME TO THROW IT AWAY IN MY TINY ASS TRASHCAN BEHIND THE REGISTER WHEN THE TRASHCAN IS 6 FT AWAY OUTSIDE.
6) Keep your kids on leashes...okay that was harsh. DONT LET THEM WALK AROUND FUCKING UP THE STORE.
7) If the mall closes at 9:00pm and you try and walk into my store on a night I'm closing around 8:53pm...PUT ON YOUR BOXING GLOVES.
8)Don't try and ask for a discount on a shoe because there's one tiny little detail on it that's microscopic...unless you're friends with inspector fucking gadget, I'm 100% positive that no one would notice it or even care. P.S. we rarely give discounts, unless something really is wrong with the shoe.
9) This is NOT A KICK IT SPOT, do not just come in and sit on the benches and try on shoes because your mom is late from picking yo ass and your little mallrat friends up.
10) IF YOU EVER EVER TRY TO STEAL FROM MY STORE, I WILL CHASE YOU ALL THE WAY TO TJ, COMPRENDE?
So I'm glad that we got all of this cleared up, hopefully I will not see this happen...especially if you are reading this blog right now. I swear, we're not aggressive at my store at all, in fact if we talk about a customer....it's usually in the back where the shoes are. Just know that we do appreciate your purchases and hope you come back soon...BUT PULL A HO MOVE LIKE ANY OF THE FOLLOWING LISTED UP THERE, AND YOU WILL BE ESCORTED OUT (by my foot up your ass)
peace, love, and shoes
<3jenilla
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
"I feel like you're eyeballing me son!"
Have you ever been to a place or think of something and it AUTOMATICALLY leads you to think about someone in your life that you secretly have a crush on? Well shit I almost always think of someone in almost every situation. Honestly, I could be in the toilet paper isle in VONS and I'll think of my friend Daniel and how he uses a british accent when he says "tissues", instead he says, "TIZZZSUES". I know he sounds kind of retarded right now, but he really is sooooo funny when he says it.
Anywhoozels, here is a list I have compiled of places and things that remind me of people...
1. A shiny new black RSX with a tail...reminds me of this guy I used to date who had that car, it's sort of sickening...but everytime I see one on the road I glance and see who's driving. Now don't get me wrong, we ended things on good terms. He just had bomb.com style and pretty good music taste, and a nice car, and a job, and was cute. Oh wait, why did we stop seeing each other?
BECAUSE THE JIGGA PRACTICALLY WANTED TO MARRY ME AFTER A MONTH! he was a lot older than me...like 4 years and wanted me to be his girlfriend after 2 dates. CREEPY, but also FLATTERING! hahah
2. Macy's shoes department in fashion valley mall...
HELLO HOTTIE McHOTTIE! Super cute guy who has plugs and a mohawk and cute smile and who although may be dressing businessy for his job, knows how to rock out at shows! No I am not a stalker, I just so happen to go to a lot of concerts and have seen him at a few. Bonus? HE MUST HAVE THE SAME MUSIC TASTE AS ME. too bad I don't see him there as much anymore, NOT THAT I was CHECKING.
3. Baby socks: This reminds me of an old friend that I had back in elementary and all through middle school. This bitch's feet is sooooooo crazy small that she wears baby socks! Can you imagine? Okay, she's not really a bitch, I love her but it's just a form of expression. Yeah I like low socks too, but honey my feet are size 8 and I would need at least 2 baby socks to fit 5 toes. Hey, don't judge my foot size...I'm 5'8''.
4. Starbucks in mission valley mall: The only boo boo who knows how to make my drink correctly...and it doesn't help that he's super tall, dark, and handsome. So why do I choose to study there instead of at school?
2 reasons: him and people in the library talk too much.
5. Chicken noodle soup: will always remind me of my junior or senior year pep rally and how our fabulous step team used that song as a part of their routine. After the step team graduated, pep rallies were never the same.
6. BIOLOGY! There seems to be a pattern, maybe I am as boy crazy as people say I am cause apparently this is about a man as well. My 11th grade biology class had a super super sexy t.a. whose name will not be revealed. He was the only reason I even cared to show up to that class. When we were learning about reproduction, I got to "mate" with him! It may have not been in real life...but he still has my number and texts me. heeeeyyy!
7. Chipotle @ school: Sad face, will always remind me of having lunch with my boo boos ONELL AND AUDREY AND MOST RECENTLY REJEL all througout spring semester 08. Every week, it was chipotle with my boos and hot gossip. Too bad they only have tues/thurs classes now, and I have mwf. eff me two times.
8. San Franciso....that one's easy. rho rascals on my first ever trip to sf <3. best three days ever. best clam chowder ever. best marc by marc jacobs store ever. best girls to go on a trip with. ohhhh memories.
9. Lonely park in LV! We in the hood now! Oh yes that was the kick it spot for my best friend Linh and all of our middle school friends. We would literally walk there after school at least twice a week. That's where I got my first kiss on the cheek(from a guy who is now gay...figure my luck haha)and where people would just go to have a good ol casual time.
10. Last but certainly not least my friends is...SEA WORLD! Where I got my first ever job and where I became friends with sooo many people that I am still close to today. These were the best of times, these were the worst of times. Had a couple crushes, got stalked by a tall black guy that worked with me, and it really felt like summer camp. THANK GOD I GOT THE FUCK OUT. (the uniforms were a different story)
So in life there will always be places that remind us of people as well as things that trigger a memory. All I know is, Macy's guy...I'M COMING TO GET YOU. Wait that sounded wrong..."I'LL BE COMING IN FOR SOME CUTE NEW FLATS AND YOU'RE GONNA GET A BIG TIP." interpret that however you'd like.
xoxo
gossip girl
just kidding
<3 jenilla
Anywhoozels, here is a list I have compiled of places and things that remind me of people...
1. A shiny new black RSX with a tail...reminds me of this guy I used to date who had that car, it's sort of sickening...but everytime I see one on the road I glance and see who's driving. Now don't get me wrong, we ended things on good terms. He just had bomb.com style and pretty good music taste, and a nice car, and a job, and was cute. Oh wait, why did we stop seeing each other?
BECAUSE THE JIGGA PRACTICALLY WANTED TO MARRY ME AFTER A MONTH! he was a lot older than me...like 4 years and wanted me to be his girlfriend after 2 dates. CREEPY, but also FLATTERING! hahah
2. Macy's shoes department in fashion valley mall...
HELLO HOTTIE McHOTTIE! Super cute guy who has plugs and a mohawk and cute smile and who although may be dressing businessy for his job, knows how to rock out at shows! No I am not a stalker, I just so happen to go to a lot of concerts and have seen him at a few. Bonus? HE MUST HAVE THE SAME MUSIC TASTE AS ME. too bad I don't see him there as much anymore, NOT THAT I was CHECKING.
3. Baby socks: This reminds me of an old friend that I had back in elementary and all through middle school. This bitch's feet is sooooooo crazy small that she wears baby socks! Can you imagine? Okay, she's not really a bitch, I love her but it's just a form of expression. Yeah I like low socks too, but honey my feet are size 8 and I would need at least 2 baby socks to fit 5 toes. Hey, don't judge my foot size...I'm 5'8''.
4. Starbucks in mission valley mall: The only boo boo who knows how to make my drink correctly...and it doesn't help that he's super tall, dark, and handsome. So why do I choose to study there instead of at school?
2 reasons: him and people in the library talk too much.
5. Chicken noodle soup: will always remind me of my junior or senior year pep rally and how our fabulous step team used that song as a part of their routine. After the step team graduated, pep rallies were never the same.
6. BIOLOGY! There seems to be a pattern, maybe I am as boy crazy as people say I am cause apparently this is about a man as well. My 11th grade biology class had a super super sexy t.a. whose name will not be revealed. He was the only reason I even cared to show up to that class. When we were learning about reproduction, I got to "mate" with him! It may have not been in real life...but he still has my number and texts me. heeeeyyy!
7. Chipotle @ school: Sad face, will always remind me of having lunch with my boo boos ONELL AND AUDREY AND MOST RECENTLY REJEL all througout spring semester 08. Every week, it was chipotle with my boos and hot gossip. Too bad they only have tues/thurs classes now, and I have mwf. eff me two times.
8. San Franciso....that one's easy. rho rascals on my first ever trip to sf <3. best three days ever. best clam chowder ever. best marc by marc jacobs store ever. best girls to go on a trip with. ohhhh memories.
9. Lonely park in LV! We in the hood now! Oh yes that was the kick it spot for my best friend Linh and all of our middle school friends. We would literally walk there after school at least twice a week. That's where I got my first kiss on the cheek(from a guy who is now gay...figure my luck haha)and where people would just go to have a good ol casual time.
10. Last but certainly not least my friends is...SEA WORLD! Where I got my first ever job and where I became friends with sooo many people that I am still close to today. These were the best of times, these were the worst of times. Had a couple crushes, got stalked by a tall black guy that worked with me, and it really felt like summer camp. THANK GOD I GOT THE FUCK OUT. (the uniforms were a different story)
So in life there will always be places that remind us of people as well as things that trigger a memory. All I know is, Macy's guy...I'M COMING TO GET YOU. Wait that sounded wrong..."I'LL BE COMING IN FOR SOME CUTE NEW FLATS AND YOU'RE GONNA GET A BIG TIP." interpret that however you'd like.
xoxo
gossip girl
just kidding
<3 jenilla
Thursday, February 19, 2009
"She rocking that thang...."
So that sign will definiely be applied at my birthday party this saturday!
It's like that Ludacris song,
"Got a big weed stash
pocket full of cash
just seen a big ol ass
it's saturday!
ohhh ohhh
sticky icky icky.."
Except my version will be
"Got a big weed stash
pocket full of cash
just got drunk and fell on my ass
it's my birthday!
ohhh ohhhh
sticky icky icky..."
Current events before my birthday...
-saw a pro skater's PRIVATES on my friend's phone
-pretty sure I'm getting a tattoo next week of either a music note or a peace sign
-totally blew it with my class boo boo, but next week...IT'S ON!
-Actually woke up to write my essay this morning, and accomplished it! but don't get excited, my procrastination is still stuck in my closet....and guess what motherfucker, it's coming out tomorrow!
-no work until tuesday
LIFE IS GOOD
Pre-party ritual...
-get my hurrrr did by my o.g. salon boo boo TROY (SNIPZ SALON, hunay, anyting he do fo you)
-make my 23 year old sister buy all the booze and smuggle it by putting it in a huge luggage
-get ready while listening to HARDCORE.....r&b/hip hop
-GET READY TO GET MY SWERVE ON!!!!!!
For those of you who do attend my party, I just wanna apologize ahead of time for if I do any of the following:
-yell or scream at you while drunkingly slurring my words
-flash you a little A if I bend over or fall down drunkingly (don't worry, I'll be wearing panties, but I won't tell you which kind)
-spill a drink on a shirt, shoes, pants...FACE
-fall asleep and forget to entertain the rest of the beezies that are still lingering
-forget to introduce you to someone, like my best friend who's having the party with me
-don't say goodbye, because if I do it will most likely be said like this..."guh byyyyyeeeeeeea"
I'M SO EXCITED, AND I JUST CAN'T HIDE IT!
Please Buddha, do not let me make a complete fool of myself at my party.
THANK YOU.
-j
-
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
Pop off PUTAS I'm 20!
So my birthday was yesterday and IT WAS ONE OF THE BEST EVER!
So how did I start my day off?...unfortunately I had to go to a manager meeting at fucking 7am in the morning, but that's life as a regulator huh?
Good news! There was only one customer complaint about me and it was the same old motherfucker who got upset that I said "fucking" in front of him. So that was that. Side note, my other coworker who has a crush on me kept trying to give me a birthday kiss, but um yeah I passed. Considering the fact that he has a gf...yeee son I don't mess with that.
Did I ever mention THANK YOU TO EVERYONE WHO GAVE ME BIRTHDAY WISHES!?
Honestly I hadn't had that many birthday wishes flooding up my text inbox or my facebook since my 18th birthday. It was insane, jiggas that I have not seen or spoken to since high school were all up on my page telling me happy birthday. IT WAS THE SWEETEST THING, now if only all of them lived in my area, they could all go to my party.
Can you imagine how sweeet that would be? Especially if I had the no present= no entry rule. Haha, but I'm kidding. It did mean a lot though. I almost wanted to write thank you's back on everyone's pages but then I would probably get arthritis or carpal tunnel syndrome, and how am I gonna twirl and flip my hair if my hands are messed up?
I knew it was gonna be a good day, because I heard my favorite love song the first thing turning on the radio. "Let's stay together" by my boo boo Al Green. Hey, a little soul never hurt nobody.
So I was unfortunately a repeat offender on my birthday, but I was like shiet I couldn't help it. I went to Cheesecake Factory twice because my older seeeesters who I love treated me for lunch and then I had dinner with my rho boo boos at night at the same place.
You know what they say, different meal...same beezy.
2nd best thing ever, next to the Al Green radio special....MY music midterm was moved to next week! WHOO HOO YOU KNOW I WAS DOING THE FIRST OF THE MONTH POSE!
The only thing missing at my birthday, were my boo boos jo'ann and daniel and tim! yeah, I'm calling you guys out. UCLA AND UC IRVINE took them away from me.
EVEN THOUGH MY BIRTHDAY WAS ON A DAMN TUESDAY, AND IT WAS SORT OF RAINY WEATHER, ONE THING IS TRUE
BEST BIRTHDAY EVER!
...until my 21st birthday, but with that...just watch out.
cuz
jigga imma get fucked up!
peace, love, and grey goose!
<3>
Monday, February 16, 2009
"Can't keep a good bitch down..."-Lil Kim
So here are some current events...
1) My 20th birthday is tomorrow!!!! yay! here's to another year of underaged drinking and illegal activities going unnoticed.
2) There are customer complaints for my job...and I have a feeling I have something to do about it...FUCK
3) A guy that I know has a girlfriend and I just realized that I am going to be single forever.
4) This beezy I know makes me wants to shoot her face.
So let's start, shall we?
Holy smokes, I cannot believe I AM ALMOST NOT A TEEN ANYMORE! However I have not changed much, besides the fact that I finally realized what I wanna do in life...I'm still the same chica, just with a different hair color from last year ohhh and fuck it's rainy season yet again during my birthday.
Inside scoop: I LOVE GIFT CARDS. I don't believe in that "it's not personal enough" bullll-loney! Cause shooot, not many people can interpret my style in the items they buy me so let's keep it simple this year and HEY! JUST DO GIFT CARDS TO MY FAVORITE STORES: american apparel, urban outfitters, and forever 21. Let's just say, I AM NOT trying to receive gifts like pink cableknit sweaters and weird ass platform roxy shoes. Nice effort though. Am I rude for not liking all my gifts? I believe the correct response to that is IM HUMAN, most of the time.
Holla at me DOS TIMES...
Okay, I understand that I do customer service with my job, but sometimes customers are just fucking re-dic-a-dack. TRANSLATION: are asking for too much. This man who was well over the age of 45 called to complain about me to another store claiming that i "cussed in front of him". Well my mom always said I cussed like a sailor. Yes I do, but foreallllz a 45 year old man is tattling on me? Like shit, this isn't elementary school.
I'm trying to imagine how his day went...
"Hey cats I'm home (I'm being an asshole and assuming all he has are cats and that's it), well today was a pretty good day, until I went into the V@&$ store and heard an asian girl say the F-U-C-K word...luckily I have no life so I told on her!"
Okay well there were other complaints that I don't know about and here is what I know...I have a manager meeting tomorrow and my manager is going to talk about it....and jesus christ I hope only 2 complaints were about me.
Don't judge me, I'm awesome with customer service....last week I was on my period.
YEAH I SAID IT, YOU WANNA MEET THE WITCH OF THE WEST? Talk to me on the 2nd week every month.
Girls, you know what I'm talking about, and guys...just act like you never read this paragraph.
If that ruins my birthday...consider this my resignation. Sorrrrry I can't be Sally Sunshine 24/7...shiiiiiet!
New topic....
this topic really left me dumbfounded for like 23 minutes in the middle of studying for poli sci and music class. So....
This guy that I've known for years who has always been single has a DUN DUN DUN a girllllllllllllfriend! I know, it's crazy...I am literally in the "WOWWY WOW WOW WOW" mode.
Don't get me wrong, I'm happy for him...however I am still single and well da da da da damn, I hope that this year I do find a TENDERONI...naw mean? <3
Last topic of the night so I could go back to studying...
This flooozy that I know (unfortunately) is still pulling ho moves and talking about things that were said in the past and just being an annoyance. I realized that I forgot to pack something this morning as I was getting ready...then I saw her face today and realized that I had forgotten to pack my shotgun. Damn it! Okay I wouldn't really shoot her, maybe if I decide to...it'll be with a paintball gun. : ) It's sort of like that jonas brothers song..."burning up". Only this time, it's my blood boiling.
So crap, this was a long ass blog with time that should have been spent studying...so I will go back to studying now.
Even though all of these current events are pretty crazy...you know what they say
"Can't keep a good bitch down." I love lil kim.
All I know is that I'm going to party it up this saturday at my party and to everyone else, try not to get puke on your shoes on saturday. cuz bitch im about to be 20!!!!!!!
peace, love, and rho
<3 j
1) My 20th birthday is tomorrow!!!! yay! here's to another year of underaged drinking and illegal activities going unnoticed.
2) There are customer complaints for my job...and I have a feeling I have something to do about it...FUCK
3) A guy that I know has a girlfriend and I just realized that I am going to be single forever.
4) This beezy I know makes me wants to shoot her face.
So let's start, shall we?
Holy smokes, I cannot believe I AM ALMOST NOT A TEEN ANYMORE! However I have not changed much, besides the fact that I finally realized what I wanna do in life...I'm still the same chica, just with a different hair color from last year ohhh and fuck it's rainy season yet again during my birthday.
Inside scoop: I LOVE GIFT CARDS. I don't believe in that "it's not personal enough" bullll-loney! Cause shooot, not many people can interpret my style in the items they buy me so let's keep it simple this year and HEY! JUST DO GIFT CARDS TO MY FAVORITE STORES: american apparel, urban outfitters, and forever 21. Let's just say, I AM NOT trying to receive gifts like pink cableknit sweaters and weird ass platform roxy shoes. Nice effort though. Am I rude for not liking all my gifts? I believe the correct response to that is IM HUMAN, most of the time.
Holla at me DOS TIMES...
Okay, I understand that I do customer service with my job, but sometimes customers are just fucking re-dic-a-dack. TRANSLATION: are asking for too much. This man who was well over the age of 45 called to complain about me to another store claiming that i "cussed in front of him". Well my mom always said I cussed like a sailor. Yes I do, but foreallllz a 45 year old man is tattling on me? Like shit, this isn't elementary school.
I'm trying to imagine how his day went...
"Hey cats I'm home (I'm being an asshole and assuming all he has are cats and that's it), well today was a pretty good day, until I went into the V@&$ store and heard an asian girl say the F-U-C-K word...luckily I have no life so I told on her!"
Okay well there were other complaints that I don't know about and here is what I know...I have a manager meeting tomorrow and my manager is going to talk about it....and jesus christ I hope only 2 complaints were about me.
Don't judge me, I'm awesome with customer service....last week I was on my period.
YEAH I SAID IT, YOU WANNA MEET THE WITCH OF THE WEST? Talk to me on the 2nd week every month.
Girls, you know what I'm talking about, and guys...just act like you never read this paragraph.
If that ruins my birthday...consider this my resignation. Sorrrrry I can't be Sally Sunshine 24/7...shiiiiiet!
New topic....
this topic really left me dumbfounded for like 23 minutes in the middle of studying for poli sci and music class. So....
This guy that I've known for years who has always been single has a DUN DUN DUN a girllllllllllllfriend! I know, it's crazy...I am literally in the "WOWWY WOW WOW WOW" mode.
Don't get me wrong, I'm happy for him...however I am still single and well da da da da damn, I hope that this year I do find a TENDERONI...naw mean? <3
Last topic of the night so I could go back to studying...
This flooozy that I know (unfortunately) is still pulling ho moves and talking about things that were said in the past and just being an annoyance. I realized that I forgot to pack something this morning as I was getting ready...then I saw her face today and realized that I had forgotten to pack my shotgun. Damn it! Okay I wouldn't really shoot her, maybe if I decide to...it'll be with a paintball gun. : ) It's sort of like that jonas brothers song..."burning up". Only this time, it's my blood boiling.
So crap, this was a long ass blog with time that should have been spent studying...so I will go back to studying now.
Even though all of these current events are pretty crazy...you know what they say
"Can't keep a good bitch down." I love lil kim.
All I know is that I'm going to party it up this saturday at my party and to everyone else, try not to get puke on your shoes on saturday. cuz bitch im about to be 20!!!!!!!
peace, love, and rho
<3 j
Monday, February 9, 2009
DIME A DOZEN
So since there were so many typos in my last piece, I am actually going to proof read this tonight...
Here's what has been brought to my attention. A guy I know says he does not like me because he think's I'm weird and that I "look mean". His identity will be kept secret so instead, we will just call him "No Balls".
Anyways....So I thought about it and he thinks that I dress weird, I talk weird, and that my personality is weird. Well LIKE OH MY GOD, I GUESS SINCE I'M NOT THE TYPICAL ASIAN, THAT MAKES ME A FUCKING LEPER!
Let's see what makes me "so weird".
I don't dress like the typical asian girl, yes I do love forever 21 but perhaps I should dress it head to toe with accents of hollister and a&f in it. Then maybe I would be considered "normal".
Hmmm I guess that deep v-necks from urban outfitters and afrika print skirts from american apparel is SO FREAKING WILD FOR SOME PEOPLE.
If I looked like the girl above, maybe I would get more accepted.
All my life I have been seen as the black sheep, but I really enjoy it. I would honestly stand out in a crowd then be just another asian. Don't get me wrong, I LOVE BEING ASIAN, I especially love my culture and where I came from. The only problem is that other typical asian guys only get along with typical asian girls.
I CALL BULLSHIT.
What makes someone normal? Plus who dictates this? Apparently, that guy that I know feels that he has the divine right to judge people and dislike them for being different. But then again, he's just another guy that I know who has height syndrome. He is just another guy who is good at sports and thinks that JUST BECAUSE HE'S TALL, that automatically means he's good looking. Well, fuck if that were the case in real life...then YAO MING IS THE BEST DAMN LOOKING GUY EVERRRRRR!!!!
So maybe this rant seems immature and uncalled for, but it's people like him that make me appreciate so much more how damn diverse I am. It also makes me so much more appreciative of the very very few people who know me, actually know me and love me for me.
GUYS LIKE YOU ARE A DIME A DOZEN....
This is pretty much who you are, just another typical asian guy who is obsessed with being NORMAL.
tell me something, does this seem normal to you?
Well apparently it's normal to him.
This is what I say about people like him...
GROW THE FUCK UP, AND GET YOUR HEAD OUT OF YOUR ASS
IF YOU KEEP BEING LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, HOW ARE YOU EVER GOING TO STAND OUT IN LIFE?
being judgemental doesn't exactly make you different from the rest.
...and for those who are the black sheep like me, well we could just all go and be weird together.
In life, all you can really do is... DO YOU.
-jenilla
Here's what has been brought to my attention. A guy I know says he does not like me because he think's I'm weird and that I "look mean". His identity will be kept secret so instead, we will just call him "No Balls".
Anyways....So I thought about it and he thinks that I dress weird, I talk weird, and that my personality is weird. Well LIKE OH MY GOD, I GUESS SINCE I'M NOT THE TYPICAL ASIAN, THAT MAKES ME A FUCKING LEPER!
Let's see what makes me "so weird".
I don't dress like the typical asian girl, yes I do love forever 21 but perhaps I should dress it head to toe with accents of hollister and a&f in it. Then maybe I would be considered "normal".
Hmmm I guess that deep v-necks from urban outfitters and afrika print skirts from american apparel is SO FREAKING WILD FOR SOME PEOPLE.
If I looked like the girl above, maybe I would get more accepted.
All my life I have been seen as the black sheep, but I really enjoy it. I would honestly stand out in a crowd then be just another asian. Don't get me wrong, I LOVE BEING ASIAN, I especially love my culture and where I came from. The only problem is that other typical asian guys only get along with typical asian girls.
I CALL BULLSHIT.
What makes someone normal? Plus who dictates this? Apparently, that guy that I know feels that he has the divine right to judge people and dislike them for being different. But then again, he's just another guy that I know who has height syndrome. He is just another guy who is good at sports and thinks that JUST BECAUSE HE'S TALL, that automatically means he's good looking. Well, fuck if that were the case in real life...then YAO MING IS THE BEST DAMN LOOKING GUY EVERRRRRR!!!!
So maybe this rant seems immature and uncalled for, but it's people like him that make me appreciate so much more how damn diverse I am. It also makes me so much more appreciative of the very very few people who know me, actually know me and love me for me.
GUYS LIKE YOU ARE A DIME A DOZEN....
This is pretty much who you are, just another typical asian guy who is obsessed with being NORMAL.
tell me something, does this seem normal to you?
Well apparently it's normal to him.
This is what I say about people like him...
GROW THE FUCK UP, AND GET YOUR HEAD OUT OF YOUR ASS
IF YOU KEEP BEING LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, HOW ARE YOU EVER GOING TO STAND OUT IN LIFE?
being judgemental doesn't exactly make you different from the rest.
...and for those who are the black sheep like me, well we could just all go and be weird together.
In life, all you can really do is... DO YOU.
-jenilla
Sunday, February 8, 2009
Trouble Sleeping
Fucking hell...
I'm in a sophmore slump!
Even though winter break ended weeks ago, I don't know why my all my downtime results in doing anything but homework or studying.
You would think that because I finally found out what I was doing with my life, I would be more on track right? NOPE.
Let's see where my faults are...
9:00-9:50 World History with A REAL LIVE DINOSAUR
No, I'm not being mean by saying that. He literally is a nice professor, but his lectures involve him standing inside a huge lecture class drawing ill thought out maps of countries and then incorporting hobbits in them. Who is this teacher, you may speak of? It's Prof. Beasely or as I like to call him Beasely fo Sheezy. Thank god I have my friend sandra in that class, otherwise I would probably ditch M W lectures every week. Plus one of the boo boos from my one of my class's last semester is in that huge lecture...so naturally half the time I'm trying to figure out where he's sitting. Don't call me a stalker, you know your bitch ass would be looking for your crush in your lecture too...hush.
Here is a picture of my professor. Call him Prof Reptar...maybe then I would pay attention...
So let's see, my next class oh shiet it's STATISTICS!
The infamous class that half of my friend failed the first time and the determining factor to seeing if I can pass it the first time. Besides the fact that I HATE MATH, ANY TYPE. My professor is a crazy man. He always brings up a 450 lb student when he talks about outliers. My guess is that he must've been or known a guy who was 45o lbs. That's why he obsesses over it. That class though is sooooooooooo hard to focus in, I strongly believe that I just have ADD when it comes to STATs because I was fine in my other math classes.... This is pretty much me in stats class...
Next is poli sci...which I can actually stand because my teacher is pretty cool and funny. Plus she actually was genius enough to have a powerpoint so that the entire class is not looking like me in the photo above.
English class now! This is yet another class that there is just the cutest boo boo...except in this case....ITS MY TEACHING ASSISTANT. HE IS SOOOOOO HEAVENLY. Although he sort of a gump, he is probably the best looking teaching assistant on campus.
What pops in my head when I see him? Probably the "How deep is your love" song by the BeeGees because he is older...so I like to pull out my favorite classics.
OMG MY FAVORITE CLASS BECAUSE THERE IS LITERALLY NO HOMEWORK OR STUDYING PLUS TWO OF MY BESTIES ARE IN THAT CLASS PLUS ANOTHER BOO BOO!
Besides the fact that I am THE KARAOKE KILLER....i love choir. NOT BECAUSE I think my voice is Mariah Carey status...but simply because it's fun and it's a good release after a laundry list of boring ass classes.
The songs are not really my choice, because I personally would want to be singing "Is this love" by Bob Marley or "Back that ass up" by Juvenile, or even "Always be my baby" by Mariah Carey....instead we have songs with sexual inuendos that were written in the 1950s or songs about god. Which is interesting, considering the fact that I'm a buddhist.
Anyways, there is one song that I love and in it, it says
"I'd like to sup with my baby tonight..." (obviously sexual right?)
NOPE ITS ABOUT "HAVING SUPPER"
another line...
"I'd like to coo with my baby tonight"(I'm guessing it's sexual again)
This is what I think it is...
They are DEFINITELY "cooing" And if that's not cooing, I don't know WHAT IS!
So those are just some of my classes....
But yet I am lacking so much motivation.
All I know is that I better step it up this semester. Or else I'm gonna end up a college drop out, working at the local liquor store....but selling cigarettes on the side to minors....and also selling porn to dirty old men, and having to sell my car which would result in me riding roller blades everywhere.!!!!!!!
LIKE BRINK!
...okay I kid, that movie was prettttttty sweet. Plus erik von detton is still quite cute. Ohhhh BRINK!
Point is, JIGGA I GOTTA STUDY!
-jenilla
I'm in a sophmore slump!
Even though winter break ended weeks ago, I don't know why my all my downtime results in doing anything but homework or studying.
You would think that because I finally found out what I was doing with my life, I would be more on track right? NOPE.
Let's see where my faults are...
9:00-9:50 World History with A REAL LIVE DINOSAUR
No, I'm not being mean by saying that. He literally is a nice professor, but his lectures involve him standing inside a huge lecture class drawing ill thought out maps of countries and then incorporting hobbits in them. Who is this teacher, you may speak of? It's Prof. Beasely or as I like to call him Beasely fo Sheezy. Thank god I have my friend sandra in that class, otherwise I would probably ditch M W lectures every week. Plus one of the boo boos from my one of my class's last semester is in that huge lecture...so naturally half the time I'm trying to figure out where he's sitting. Don't call me a stalker, you know your bitch ass would be looking for your crush in your lecture too...hush.
Here is a picture of my professor. Call him Prof Reptar...maybe then I would pay attention...
So let's see, my next class oh shiet it's STATISTICS!
The infamous class that half of my friend failed the first time and the determining factor to seeing if I can pass it the first time. Besides the fact that I HATE MATH, ANY TYPE. My professor is a crazy man. He always brings up a 450 lb student when he talks about outliers. My guess is that he must've been or known a guy who was 45o lbs. That's why he obsesses over it. That class though is sooooooooooo hard to focus in, I strongly believe that I just have ADD when it comes to STATs because I was fine in my other math classes.... This is pretty much me in stats class...
Next is poli sci...which I can actually stand because my teacher is pretty cool and funny. Plus she actually was genius enough to have a powerpoint so that the entire class is not looking like me in the photo above.
English class now! This is yet another class that there is just the cutest boo boo...except in this case....ITS MY TEACHING ASSISTANT. HE IS SOOOOOO HEAVENLY. Although he sort of a gump, he is probably the best looking teaching assistant on campus.
What pops in my head when I see him? Probably the "How deep is your love" song by the BeeGees because he is older...so I like to pull out my favorite classics.
OMG MY FAVORITE CLASS BECAUSE THERE IS LITERALLY NO HOMEWORK OR STUDYING PLUS TWO OF MY BESTIES ARE IN THAT CLASS PLUS ANOTHER BOO BOO!
Besides the fact that I am THE KARAOKE KILLER....i love choir. NOT BECAUSE I think my voice is Mariah Carey status...but simply because it's fun and it's a good release after a laundry list of boring ass classes.
The songs are not really my choice, because I personally would want to be singing "Is this love" by Bob Marley or "Back that ass up" by Juvenile, or even "Always be my baby" by Mariah Carey....instead we have songs with sexual inuendos that were written in the 1950s or songs about god. Which is interesting, considering the fact that I'm a buddhist.
Anyways, there is one song that I love and in it, it says
"I'd like to sup with my baby tonight..." (obviously sexual right?)
NOPE ITS ABOUT "HAVING SUPPER"
another line...
"I'd like to coo with my baby tonight"(I'm guessing it's sexual again)
This is what I think it is...
They are DEFINITELY "cooing" And if that's not cooing, I don't know WHAT IS!
So those are just some of my classes....
But yet I am lacking so much motivation.
All I know is that I better step it up this semester. Or else I'm gonna end up a college drop out, working at the local liquor store....but selling cigarettes on the side to minors....and also selling porn to dirty old men, and having to sell my car which would result in me riding roller blades everywhere.!!!!!!!
LIKE BRINK!
...okay I kid, that movie was prettttttty sweet. Plus erik von detton is still quite cute. Ohhhh BRINK!
Point is, JIGGA I GOTTA STUDY!
-jenilla
Monday, February 2, 2009
Dearly Retarded, try to make it to the SANE SOCIETY
Ever have someone that you knew back in the day still hating you?
That one grudge that they have just won't disappear because all she can do is talk crap about you to entertain her own pathetic little life?
Well I unfortunately do have some people who have a lifetime subscription to MY MAGAZINE....and all they do is comment on allllll the freaking pages. But hey, they keep reading the pages, so I guess in some sick and demented way....THEY NEED TO HAVE ME IN THEIR SMALL, MEANINGLESS LIVES.
Enough of this rant. Here are some examples of some major HATERS!
These are the type OF MAINLY GIRLS that you don't want to be close to. Mainly because they talk talk talk talk talk. If you put all of their disoriented sentences together, you would most likely get 5 dictionaries worth of words. But I like said, they just ARE BEING HATERS.
But then that's when you have to remember, my favorite motto: "IT'S NOT THAT SERIOUS BOO BOO!" cause jigga, it sure aint. There will always be bigger issues to tackle, bigger things to come, and most importantly, bigger objects to throw at their bitch ass car. Just joshing you....I would never pull a ho move like that.
In daylight,
peace out haters
<3 jenilla
Be like this kid, he seems pretty happy with life. But try to do it with a little less plastic, a little more discretion.
**okay well i was going to add a picture of a kid with a blow up doll's legs between him, yeah i know totally appropriate and adorable. BUT IT WOULDNT FUCKING LOAD. so just imagine a 5 year old white kid happy as can be with a girl blow up doll between his legs. ISNT IT PRECIOUS? hahah**I'll upload it later.
That one grudge that they have just won't disappear because all she can do is talk crap about you to entertain her own pathetic little life?
Well I unfortunately do have some people who have a lifetime subscription to MY MAGAZINE....and all they do is comment on allllll the freaking pages. But hey, they keep reading the pages, so I guess in some sick and demented way....THEY NEED TO HAVE ME IN THEIR SMALL, MEANINGLESS LIVES.
Enough of this rant. Here are some examples of some major HATERS!
These are the type OF MAINLY GIRLS that you don't want to be close to. Mainly because they talk talk talk talk talk. If you put all of their disoriented sentences together, you would most likely get 5 dictionaries worth of words. But I like said, they just ARE BEING HATERS.
But then that's when you have to remember, my favorite motto: "IT'S NOT THAT SERIOUS BOO BOO!" cause jigga, it sure aint. There will always be bigger issues to tackle, bigger things to come, and most importantly, bigger objects to throw at their bitch ass car. Just joshing you....I would never pull a ho move like that.
In daylight,
peace out haters
<3 jenilla
Be like this kid, he seems pretty happy with life. But try to do it with a little less plastic, a little more discretion.
**okay well i was going to add a picture of a kid with a blow up doll's legs between him, yeah i know totally appropriate and adorable. BUT IT WOULDNT FUCKING LOAD. so just imagine a 5 year old white kid happy as can be with a girl blow up doll between his legs. ISNT IT PRECIOUS? hahah**I'll upload it later.
Saturday, January 31, 2009
Go girl, she doing it.
So I am about to go to a party...possibly two parties. And I notice that there is always a string of patterns that follows these little "get togethers. " Here I have compiled a list of "typical party happenings". Trust me, I've been to enough parties...that I could just look at a person at first glance and know they are on a mission to get fucked up. I however, do not usually get THAT indisposed...why? Because my asshole boss always seems to schedule me EVERY FREAKIN SUNDAY! Honestly, he is so lucky that I don't go to church cause I'm a buddhist.
Party Intro: This is what goes through your mind when you first step into the door of mayhem:
-You scope everyone out, and you if you're single...you try and find someone to your liking that you will potential make out/hook up with.
-You calculate in your head how long you're gonna be at the party. ("Hmmm I got here at 9pm, if I stay until 2 am... I would have been here for 5 hours. Good time to bounce")
-You start to check out the alcohol, so that you don't get stuck just drinking beer...and you conjure up as much free booze as your little underaged self can handle.
Mid-way into the Party/ Semi Fucked up
-You are dancing up a storm...with random strangers.
-You are thinking, what time did i say i was gonna stop drinking?
-You lost your group of friends.
-That hottie is checking you out, and you go for it.
End of the party/ right before the pigs bust in
-Make out
-throw up
-pass out
-party gets cut...fuck the police, fuck fuck fuck the police.
THE END
although this will probably NOT happen to me tonight, I am anticipating on how this will happen to about 75% of the people tonight. well i won't rule out everything. if there is a cutie, maybe there might just be a little make out sesh. BUT I DOUBT IT.
hope i dont get throw up on my shoes tonight.
-jenilla
Party Intro: This is what goes through your mind when you first step into the door of mayhem:
-You scope everyone out, and you if you're single...you try and find someone to your liking that you will potential make out/hook up with.
-You calculate in your head how long you're gonna be at the party. ("Hmmm I got here at 9pm, if I stay until 2 am... I would have been here for 5 hours. Good time to bounce")
-You start to check out the alcohol, so that you don't get stuck just drinking beer...and you conjure up as much free booze as your little underaged self can handle.
Mid-way into the Party/ Semi Fucked up
-You are dancing up a storm...with random strangers.
-You are thinking, what time did i say i was gonna stop drinking?
-You lost your group of friends.
-That hottie is checking you out, and you go for it.
End of the party/ right before the pigs bust in
-Make out
-throw up
-pass out
-party gets cut...fuck the police, fuck fuck fuck the police.
THE END
although this will probably NOT happen to me tonight, I am anticipating on how this will happen to about 75% of the people tonight. well i won't rule out everything. if there is a cutie, maybe there might just be a little make out sesh. BUT I DOUBT IT.
hope i dont get throw up on my shoes tonight.
-jenilla
Friday, January 30, 2009
I lie lie lie like you crazy
So I've rendered this in my head a million times and I've realized that I will probably always be single because my "kind of men" are not the easiest to come by.
Give me Brandon Boyd, the lead singer of Incubus... and his ambiguously good looks! What ethnicity is this fine ass fox? Well to be truthful, it sort of slipped my mind what ethnicities granted him his devilish good looks. See for yourself...
Then there's my second love, I remember when I first saw him bursting on the boob tube and then later into puberty...Shia Labeouf. Or more like Shia LaBeauty. People don't know but this adorable jew's name actually is a weird translation... Shia means "thank god" and Labeouf means "the beef" is some language. So ironically, this not so muscle man's name means "thank god for beef". More like....THANK GOD CAUSE SHIA YOU SO SEXY.
I know what you all must be thinking, this beezy doesn't like asian men? Well my next boo boo counts as half asian but nonetheless his hot piano playing hands and the fact that he's in one of my favorite bands is what makes Jesse from head automatica, my man automatically. when i met him 3 years ago...I died in his arms that night. I know, I'm totally dumb.
Finally, there is none other than BABEraham lincoln, Kirk Huffman from two bands...my favoritest band ever GATSBYS AMERICAN DREAM and then his insightful new project KAY KAY AND HIS WEATHERED UNDERGROUND. Kirk has the style sense of the hippest and most vinage rocker ever. He's basically the straight and modern version of my other boo elton john.
So there you go, maybe why these men are the reason I'm single! I will never be able to find a Brandon, a Shia, a Jesse, or a Kirk...esp around my age. But there is still hope that I will find men with those qualities. Yes, I said men. Boys are sooooo 3 years ago. It always creeps me out when I see the little subserviant boy dating the older and overbearing woman who practically has enough balls for the both of them.
I do wish that when I do eventually find that guy...who is hopefully over 5'10'', that he makes me wanna bust out and sing, "LOOOOOOOOOOOVE" by keyshia cole, otherwise we'll be back at square one.
What's square one? Let's see...either nasty bros who worship BMX-ing and SRH or guys with fucking dragon tattoos, or guys who think giving you creepy looks is what turns us on, or guys who tend to stilllll wear socks with sandals.
Let's NEVER go back to that place. It's a new year, a new year of opportunities and hopefully new men. Maybe by the end of the year I would have found my very one jesse-brandon-kirk-shia combo.
-jenilla
p.s. i really do hope i find a partner to sing Atlantic Starr's "always" with. I hate always having to be the guy when i sing with another girl. haha
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- THOUGHTS de JENilla
- Take random thoughts...mix in tourettes and then add some insightful experiences, and then blend on high for 20+ years.