"I feel like you're eyeballing me son!"

Have you ever been to a place or think of something and it AUTOMATICALLY leads you to think about someone in your life that you secretly have a crush on? Well shit I almost always think of someone in almost every situation. Honestly, I could be in the toilet paper isle in VONS and I'll think of my friend Daniel and how he uses a british accent when he says "tissues", instead he says, "TIZZZSUES". I know he sounds kind of retarded right now, but he really is sooooo funny when he says it.

Anywhoozels, here is a list I have compiled of places and things that remind me of people...

1. A shiny new black RSX with a tail...reminds me of this guy I used to date who had that car, it's sort of sickening...but everytime I see one on the road I glance and see who's driving. Now don't get me wrong, we ended things on good terms. He just had bomb.com style and pretty good music taste, and a nice car, and a job, and was cute. Oh wait, why did we stop seeing each other?

BECAUSE THE JIGGA PRACTICALLY WANTED TO MARRY ME AFTER A MONTH! he was a lot older than me...like 4 years and wanted me to be his girlfriend after 2 dates. CREEPY, but also FLATTERING! hahah

2. Macy's shoes department in fashion valley mall...
HELLO HOTTIE McHOTTIE! Super cute guy who has plugs and a mohawk and cute smile and who although may be dressing businessy for his job, knows how to rock out at shows! No I am not a stalker, I just so happen to go to a lot of concerts and have seen him at a few. Bonus? HE MUST HAVE THE SAME MUSIC TASTE AS ME. too bad I don't see him there as much anymore, NOT THAT I was CHECKING.

3. Baby socks: This reminds me of an old friend that I had back in elementary and all through middle school. This bitch's feet is sooooooo crazy small that she wears baby socks! Can you imagine? Okay, she's not really a bitch, I love her but it's just a form of expression. Yeah I like low socks too, but honey my feet are size 8 and I would need at least 2 baby socks to fit 5 toes. Hey, don't judge my foot size...I'm 5'8''.

4. Starbucks in mission valley mall: The only boo boo who knows how to make my drink correctly...and it doesn't help that he's super tall, dark, and handsome. So why do I choose to study there instead of at school?
2 reasons: him and people in the library talk too much.

5. Chicken noodle soup: will always remind me of my junior or senior year pep rally and how our fabulous step team used that song as a part of their routine. After the step team graduated, pep rallies were never the same.

6. BIOLOGY! There seems to be a pattern, maybe I am as boy crazy as people say I am cause apparently this is about a man as well. My 11th grade biology class had a super super sexy t.a. whose name will not be revealed. He was the only reason I even cared to show up to that class. When we were learning about reproduction, I got to "mate" with him! It may have not been in real life...but he still has my number and texts me. heeeeyyy!

7. Chipotle @ school: Sad face, will always remind me of having lunch with my boo boos ONELL AND AUDREY AND MOST RECENTLY REJEL all througout spring semester 08. Every week, it was chipotle with my boos and hot gossip. Too bad they only have tues/thurs classes now, and I have mwf. eff me two times.

8. San Franciso....that one's easy. rho rascals on my first ever trip to sf <3. best three days ever. best clam chowder ever. best marc by marc jacobs store ever. best girls to go on a trip with. ohhhh memories.

9. Lonely park in LV! We in the hood now! Oh yes that was the kick it spot for my best friend Linh and all of our middle school friends. We would literally walk there after school at least twice a week. That's where I got my first kiss on the cheek(from a guy who is now gay...figure my luck haha)and where people would just go to have a good ol casual time.

10. Last but certainly not least my friends is...SEA WORLD! Where I got my first ever job and where I became friends with sooo many people that I am still close to today. These were the best of times, these were the worst of times. Had a couple crushes, got stalked by a tall black guy that worked with me, and it really felt like summer camp. THANK GOD I GOT THE FUCK OUT. (the uniforms were a different story)


So in life there will always be places that remind us of people as well as things that trigger a memory. All I know is, Macy's guy...I'M COMING TO GET YOU. Wait that sounded wrong..."I'LL BE COMING IN FOR SOME CUTE NEW FLATS AND YOU'RE GONNA GET A BIG TIP." interpret that however you'd like.


xoxo
gossip girl

just kidding

<3 jenilla

"She rocking that thang...."

So that sign will definiely be applied at my birthday party this saturday!

It's like that Ludacris song,
"Got a big weed stash
pocket full of cash
just seen a big ol ass
it's saturday!
ohhh ohhh
sticky icky icky.."

Except my version will be
"Got a big weed stash
pocket full of cash
just got drunk and fell on my ass
it's my birthday!
ohhh ohhhh
sticky icky icky..."

Current events before my birthday...

-saw a pro skater's PRIVATES on my friend's phone
-pretty sure I'm getting a tattoo next week of either a music note or a peace sign
-totally blew it with my class boo boo, but next week...IT'S ON!
-Actually woke up to write my essay this morning, and accomplished it! but don't get excited, my procrastination is still stuck in my closet....and guess what motherfucker, it's coming out tomorrow!
-no work until tuesday

LIFE IS GOOD

Pre-party ritual...

-get my hurrrr did by my o.g. salon boo boo TROY (SNIPZ SALON, hunay, anyting he do fo you)
-make my 23 year old sister buy all the booze and smuggle it by putting it in a huge luggage
-get ready while listening to HARDCORE.....r&b/hip hop

-GET READY TO GET MY SWERVE ON!!!!!!

For those of you who do attend my party, I just wanna apologize ahead of time for if I do any of the following:

-yell or scream at you while drunkingly slurring my words
-flash you a little A if I bend over or fall down drunkingly (don't worry, I'll be wearing panties, but I won't tell you which kind)
-spill a drink on a shirt, shoes, pants...FACE
-fall asleep and forget to entertain the rest of the beezies that are still lingering
-forget to introduce you to someone, like my best friend who's having the party with me
-don't say goodbye, because if I do it will most likely be said like this..."guh byyyyyeeeeeeea"

I'M SO EXCITED, AND I JUST CAN'T HIDE IT!

Please Buddha, do not let me make a complete fool of myself at my party.
THANK YOU.


-j
-

Pop off PUTAS I'm 20!

So my birthday was yesterday and IT WAS ONE OF THE BEST EVER!

So how did I start my day off?...unfortunately I had to go to a manager meeting at fucking 7am in the morning, but that's life as a regulator huh?

Good news! There was only one customer complaint about me and it was the same old motherfucker who got upset that I said "fucking" in front of him. So that was that. Side note, my other coworker who has a crush on me kept trying to give me a birthday kiss, but um yeah I passed. Considering the fact that he has a gf...yeee son I don't mess with that.

Did I ever mention THANK YOU TO EVERYONE WHO GAVE ME BIRTHDAY WISHES!?

Honestly I hadn't had that many birthday wishes flooding up my text inbox or my facebook since my 18th birthday. It was insane, jiggas that I have not seen or spoken to since high school were all up on my page telling me happy birthday. IT WAS THE SWEETEST THING, now if only all of them lived in my area, they could all go to my party.

Can you imagine how sweeet that would be? Especially if I had the no present= no entry rule. Haha, but I'm kidding. It did mean a lot though. I almost wanted to write thank you's back on everyone's pages but then I would probably get arthritis or carpal tunnel syndrome, and how am I gonna twirl and flip my hair if my hands are messed up?

I knew it was gonna be a good day, because I heard my favorite love song the first thing turning on the radio. "Let's stay together" by my boo boo Al Green. Hey, a little soul never hurt nobody.

So I was unfortunately a repeat offender on my birthday, but I was like shiet I couldn't help it. I went to Cheesecake Factory twice because my older seeeesters who I love treated me for lunch and then I had dinner with my rho boo boos at night at the same place.

You know what they say, different meal...same beezy.

2nd best thing ever, next to the Al Green radio special....MY music midterm was moved to next week! WHOO HOO YOU KNOW I WAS DOING THE FIRST OF THE MONTH POSE!

The only thing missing at my birthday, were my boo boos jo'ann and daniel and tim! yeah, I'm calling you guys out. UCLA AND UC IRVINE took them away from me.

EVEN THOUGH MY BIRTHDAY WAS ON A DAMN TUESDAY, AND IT WAS SORT OF RAINY WEATHER, ONE THING IS TRUE

BEST BIRTHDAY EVER!

...until my 21st birthday, but with that...just watch out.

cuz

jigga imma get fucked up!

peace, love, and grey goose!

<3>

"Can't keep a good bitch down..."-Lil Kim

So here are some current events...
1) My 20th birthday is tomorrow!!!! yay! here's to another year of underaged drinking and illegal activities going unnoticed.
2) There are customer complaints for my job...and I have a feeling I have something to do about it...FUCK
3) A guy that I know has a girlfriend and I just realized that I am going to be single forever.
4) This beezy I know makes me wants to shoot her face.


So let's start, shall we?

Holy smokes, I cannot believe I AM ALMOST NOT A TEEN ANYMORE! However I have not changed much, besides the fact that I finally realized what I wanna do in life...I'm still the same chica, just with a different hair color from last year ohhh and fuck it's rainy season yet again during my birthday.

Inside scoop: I LOVE GIFT CARDS. I don't believe in that "it's not personal enough" bullll-loney! Cause shooot, not many people can interpret my style in the items they buy me so let's keep it simple this year and HEY! JUST DO GIFT CARDS TO MY FAVORITE STORES: american apparel, urban outfitters, and forever 21. Let's just say, I AM NOT trying to receive gifts like pink cableknit sweaters and weird ass platform roxy shoes. Nice effort though. Am I rude for not liking all my gifts? I believe the correct response to that is IM HUMAN, most of the time.

Holla at me DOS TIMES...

Okay, I understand that I do customer service with my job, but sometimes customers are just fucking re-dic-a-dack. TRANSLATION: are asking for too much. This man who was well over the age of 45 called to complain about me to another store claiming that i "cussed in front of him". Well my mom always said I cussed like a sailor. Yes I do, but foreallllz a 45 year old man is tattling on me? Like shit, this isn't elementary school.

I'm trying to imagine how his day went...

"Hey cats I'm home (I'm being an asshole and assuming all he has are cats and that's it), well today was a pretty good day, until I went into the V@&$ store and heard an asian girl say the F-U-C-K word...luckily I have no life so I told on her!"

Okay well there were other complaints that I don't know about and here is what I know...I have a manager meeting tomorrow and my manager is going to talk about it....and jesus christ I hope only 2 complaints were about me.

Don't judge me, I'm awesome with customer service....last week I was on my period.
YEAH I SAID IT, YOU WANNA MEET THE WITCH OF THE WEST? Talk to me on the 2nd week every month.
Girls, you know what I'm talking about, and guys...just act like you never read this paragraph.

If that ruins my birthday...consider this my resignation. Sorrrrry I can't be Sally Sunshine 24/7...shiiiiiet!

New topic....
this topic really left me dumbfounded for like 23 minutes in the middle of studying for poli sci and music class. So....

This guy that I've known for years who has always been single has a DUN DUN DUN a girllllllllllllfriend! I know, it's crazy...I am literally in the "WOWWY WOW WOW WOW" mode.

Don't get me wrong, I'm happy for him...however I am still single and well da da da da damn, I hope that this year I do find a TENDERONI...naw mean? <3

Last topic of the night so I could go back to studying...

This flooozy that I know (unfortunately) is still pulling ho moves and talking about things that were said in the past and just being an annoyance. I realized that I forgot to pack something this morning as I was getting ready...then I saw her face today and realized that I had forgotten to pack my shotgun. Damn it! Okay I wouldn't really shoot her, maybe if I decide to...it'll be with a paintball gun. : ) It's sort of like that jonas brothers song..."burning up". Only this time, it's my blood boiling.

So crap, this was a long ass blog with time that should have been spent studying...so I will go back to studying now.

Even though all of these current events are pretty crazy...you know what they say

"Can't keep a good bitch down." I love lil kim.

All I know is that I'm going to party it up this saturday at my party and to everyone else, try not to get puke on your shoes on saturday. cuz bitch im about to be 20!!!!!!!


peace, love, and rho

<3 j

DIME A DOZEN

So since there were so many typos in my last piece, I am actually going to proof read this tonight...

Here's what has been brought to my attention. A guy I know says he does not like me because he think's I'm weird and that I "look mean". His identity will be kept secret so instead, we will just call him "No Balls".

Anyways....So I thought about it and he thinks that I dress weird, I talk weird, and that my personality is weird. Well LIKE OH MY GOD, I GUESS SINCE I'M NOT THE TYPICAL ASIAN, THAT MAKES ME A FUCKING LEPER!

Let's see what makes me "so weird".

I don't dress like the typical asian girl, yes I do love forever 21 but perhaps I should dress it head to toe with accents of hollister and a&f in it. Then maybe I would be considered "normal".



Hmmm I guess that deep v-necks from urban outfitters and afrika print skirts from american apparel is SO FREAKING WILD FOR SOME PEOPLE.
If I looked like the girl above, maybe I would get more accepted.

All my life I have been seen as the black sheep, but I really enjoy it. I would honestly stand out in a crowd then be just another asian. Don't get me wrong, I LOVE BEING ASIAN, I especially love my culture and where I came from. The only problem is that other typical asian guys only get along with typical asian girls.

I CALL BULLSHIT.

What makes someone normal? Plus who dictates this? Apparently, that guy that I know feels that he has the divine right to judge people and dislike them for being different. But then again, he's just another guy that I know who has height syndrome. He is just another guy who is good at sports and thinks that JUST BECAUSE HE'S TALL, that automatically means he's good looking. Well, fuck if that were the case in real life...then YAO MING IS THE BEST DAMN LOOKING GUY EVERRRRRR!!!!

So maybe this rant seems immature and uncalled for, but it's people like him that make me appreciate so much more how damn diverse I am. It also makes me so much more appreciative of the very very few people who know me, actually know me and love me for me.

GUYS LIKE YOU ARE A DIME A DOZEN....
This is pretty much who you are, just another typical asian guy who is obsessed with being NORMAL.

tell me something, does this seem normal to you?


Well apparently it's normal to him.

This is what I say about people like him...
GROW THE FUCK UP, AND GET YOUR HEAD OUT OF YOUR ASS
IF YOU KEEP BEING LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, HOW ARE YOU EVER GOING TO STAND OUT IN LIFE?
being judgemental doesn't exactly make you different from the rest.

...and for those who are the black sheep like me, well we could just all go and be weird together.

In life, all you can really do is... DO YOU.

-jenilla

Trouble Sleeping

Fucking hell...
I'm in a sophmore slump!
Even though winter break ended weeks ago, I don't know why my all my downtime results in doing anything but homework or studying.

You would think that because I finally found out what I was doing with my life, I would be more on track right? NOPE.

Let's see where my faults are...

9:00-9:50 World History with A REAL LIVE DINOSAUR
No, I'm not being mean by saying that. He literally is a nice professor, but his lectures involve him standing inside a huge lecture class drawing ill thought out maps of countries and then incorporting hobbits in them. Who is this teacher, you may speak of? It's Prof. Beasely or as I like to call him Beasely fo Sheezy. Thank god I have my friend sandra in that class, otherwise I would probably ditch M W lectures every week. Plus one of the boo boos from my one of my class's last semester is in that huge lecture...so naturally half the time I'm trying to figure out where he's sitting. Don't call me a stalker, you know your bitch ass would be looking for your crush in your lecture too...hush.

Here is a picture of my professor. Call him Prof Reptar...maybe then I would pay attention...



So let's see, my next class oh shiet it's STATISTICS!
The infamous class that half of my friend failed the first time and the determining factor to seeing if I can pass it the first time. Besides the fact that I HATE MATH, ANY TYPE. My professor is a crazy man. He always brings up a 450 lb student when he talks about outliers. My guess is that he must've been or known a guy who was 45o lbs. That's why he obsesses over it. That class though is sooooooooooo hard to focus in, I strongly believe that I just have ADD when it comes to STATs because I was fine in my other math classes.... This is pretty much me in stats class...



Next is poli sci...which I can actually stand because my teacher is pretty cool and funny. Plus she actually was genius enough to have a powerpoint so that the entire class is not looking like me in the photo above.

English class now! This is yet another class that there is just the cutest boo boo...except in this case....ITS MY TEACHING ASSISTANT. HE IS SOOOOOO HEAVENLY. Although he sort of a gump, he is probably the best looking teaching assistant on campus.

What pops in my head when I see him? Probably the "How deep is your love" song by the BeeGees because he is older...so I like to pull out my favorite classics.

OMG MY FAVORITE CLASS BECAUSE THERE IS LITERALLY NO HOMEWORK OR STUDYING PLUS TWO OF MY BESTIES ARE IN THAT CLASS PLUS ANOTHER BOO BOO!

Besides the fact that I am THE KARAOKE KILLER....i love choir. NOT BECAUSE I think my voice is Mariah Carey status...but simply because it's fun and it's a good release after a laundry list of boring ass classes.

The songs are not really my choice, because I personally would want to be singing "Is this love" by Bob Marley or "Back that ass up" by Juvenile, or even "Always be my baby" by Mariah Carey....instead we have songs with sexual inuendos that were written in the 1950s or songs about god. Which is interesting, considering the fact that I'm a buddhist.

Anyways, there is one song that I love and in it, it says
"I'd like to sup with my baby tonight..." (obviously sexual right?)

NOPE ITS ABOUT "HAVING SUPPER"

another line...
"I'd like to coo with my baby tonight"(I'm guessing it's sexual again)
This is what I think it is...

They are DEFINITELY "cooing" And if that's not cooing, I don't know WHAT IS!



So those are just some of my classes....
But yet I am lacking so much motivation.
All I know is that I better step it up this semester. Or else I'm gonna end up a college drop out, working at the local liquor store....but selling cigarettes on the side to minors....and also selling porn to dirty old men, and having to sell my car which would result in me riding roller blades everywhere.!!!!!!!

LIKE BRINK!



...okay I kid, that movie was prettttttty sweet. Plus erik von detton is still quite cute. Ohhhh BRINK!

Point is, JIGGA I GOTTA STUDY!


-jenilla

Dearly Retarded, try to make it to the SANE SOCIETY

Ever have someone that you knew back in the day still hating you?
That one grudge that they have just won't disappear because all she can do is talk crap about you to entertain her own pathetic little life?
Well I unfortunately do have some people who have a lifetime subscription to MY MAGAZINE....and all they do is comment on allllll the freaking pages. But hey, they keep reading the pages, so I guess in some sick and demented way....THEY NEED TO HAVE ME IN THEIR SMALL, MEANINGLESS LIVES.

Enough of this rant. Here are some examples of some major HATERS!
These are the type OF MAINLY GIRLS that you don't want to be close to. Mainly because they talk talk talk talk talk. If you put all of their disoriented sentences together, you would most likely get 5 dictionaries worth of words. But I like said, they just ARE BEING HATERS.



But then that's when you have to remember, my favorite motto: "IT'S NOT THAT SERIOUS BOO BOO!" cause jigga, it sure aint. There will always be bigger issues to tackle, bigger things to come, and most importantly, bigger objects to throw at their bitch ass car. Just joshing you....I would never pull a ho move like that.




In daylight,

peace out haters
<3 jenilla

Be like this kid, he seems pretty happy with life. But try to do it with a little less plastic, a little more discretion.

**okay well i was going to add a picture of a kid with a blow up doll's legs between him, yeah i know totally appropriate and adorable. BUT IT WOULDNT FUCKING LOAD. so just imagine a 5 year old white kid happy as can be with a girl blow up doll between his legs. ISNT IT PRECIOUS? hahah**I'll upload it later.