So as many of you darlings know, who actually know me...I'm a floor supervisor/manager at this "high end" (yeah right) name brand shoe company....yeee yah get money money!
Anywhoozels, there are simple rules that I wish fuckers would learn to follow when coming in my store and I swear that if you did, you would be the perfect customer...but unfortunately there are fucking morons who still do not have the right etiquette in my store.
Listen closley kiddos...
1) Don't ever come into my store and ask if we have converse, or DCs...look at the outside of the store, does it look like it says "Journeys"? no, motherfucka, no.
2) Don't try to try on the display shoe with yo jenky ass dark ass rainbow sandal wearing toes! Here's a hint for you...if you're a female and your shoe size is bigger than 7...don't try on the display, it's NOT YOUR SIZE! For men, it's anything bigger than a 9.5, it won't fucking fit you...so don't be dumb.
3) Don't look in the store and ask for a shoe that you do not see. For example: "Do you have purple high tops?" This is not fucking in-n-out burger, jigga there ain't no secret menu! We don't have hidden stock in the back or shoe cobblers making shoes 24/7, this is not the keebler workshop.
4) If we do not carry your size, don't give us attitude. This is not costco, there is no bulk.
5) Throw away your own trash, DO NOT GIVE ME A DRINK THAT IS HALF FULL OF COFFEE AND ASK ME TO THROW IT AWAY IN MY TINY ASS TRASHCAN BEHIND THE REGISTER WHEN THE TRASHCAN IS 6 FT AWAY OUTSIDE.
6) Keep your kids on leashes...okay that was harsh. DONT LET THEM WALK AROUND FUCKING UP THE STORE.
7) If the mall closes at 9:00pm and you try and walk into my store on a night I'm closing around 8:53pm...PUT ON YOUR BOXING GLOVES.
8)Don't try and ask for a discount on a shoe because there's one tiny little detail on it that's microscopic...unless you're friends with inspector fucking gadget, I'm 100% positive that no one would notice it or even care. P.S. we rarely give discounts, unless something really is wrong with the shoe.
9) This is NOT A KICK IT SPOT, do not just come in and sit on the benches and try on shoes because your mom is late from picking yo ass and your little mallrat friends up.
10) IF YOU EVER EVER TRY TO STEAL FROM MY STORE, I WILL CHASE YOU ALL THE WAY TO TJ, COMPRENDE?
So I'm glad that we got all of this cleared up, hopefully I will not see this happen...especially if you are reading this blog right now. I swear, we're not aggressive at my store at all, in fact if we talk about a customer....it's usually in the back where the shoes are. Just know that we do appreciate your purchases and hope you come back soon...BUT PULL A HO MOVE LIKE ANY OF THE FOLLOWING LISTED UP THERE, AND YOU WILL BE ESCORTED OUT (by my foot up your ass)
peace, love, and shoes
<3jenilla
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