"Alright let's cut the shit, It's time to get SERIOUS"

It was a thursday evening around 5:45pm when I had a revelation that came tooooo late. I take economics at a community college twice a week from 6-9pm, meaning for 8 weeks I'll have no life. It took the second day of my class for me to realize why I was there.

I came to class 15 mins. early because I like sitting in the back, and to be honest there are freaking weird ass people in that class, so I try and sit in the back with my purse on the seat next to me to avoid awkward situations. As if I'm not awkward enough.

When I was waiting for class to start, I heard some of the students talking to the professor and they were all completely and utterly engaged in a conversation about economics. They weren't shooting the shit, they were ACTUALLY TALKING ABOUT THINGS THAT MATTERED AND KNOWING WHAT THEY WERE TALKING ABOUT.

...and it dawned on me, they were going to school to LEARN.
I know what you're thinking, uh no shit Jenn...isn't that why you go to school?
When I was a freshmen... YES, now I'm not too sure.

It all came full circle, these ADULTS who were in my class were students genuinely trying to learn and trying to transfer to a 4 year university. I was taking the class because I was blindsided by getting an "easy A" at the community college. They were taking that class, because they were interested in both the topic and transferring.

I complain about taking 15 units, but some of the people in this class were full time students who also worked 2 jobs and still managed to make it to class and understand the content.

I felt like for the first time in a long time, I was in an environment where I was meant to better myself.

Somehow with the partying and drugs and sex, a blurred line develops that stands in the way of why you even went to college in the first place.

Today, there are no TABOOs. Everything is said, everything is done, everything become so played out and passe.

I get so sick and tired of hearing about raves, dropping E, and getting high all the time. When did it ever become okay in society to brag about how many times you intoxicated your body full of unnnatural substances. Why is it that the only dates we care about are the ones where a rave event is coming up. Why is it that people parade around their bongs, pipes, and miscellaneous weed paraphalnalia like they just won the nobel prize? I have done drugs, and I certainly don't look down on people who do them, but in a short life when we only have so much time to make something of ourselves...don't we want to take that extra hour we spent getting high and do something ACTUALLY PRODUCTIVE?

Sex has become so over inflated in college, that it doesn't become a matter or interest in a person, it becomes a number. I personally am not promiscuous in this subject, those of you who know me, KNOW THAT. However, when someone's prime goal at a party is "to get some", then I think...can't you do that sober? Call me old fashioned, but I do believe in romance. If you slept with over 10 people and less than half are people that you've dated seriously, then boo boo we got some problems. I know that you're thinking, "Ain't no fun if the homies can't have none". But today, another lyric that goes with that is "Ain't no fun if the STDS come!" yeah...if all else fails, please use protection, otherwise I'm gonna make you name your baby after me.

What handle are you bringing to the party?
Alcohol, has become so mainstream that I honestly don't know why I drink it anymore. I hate being drunk, I like being buzzed, but I've lived over 17 years before I actually started drinking. I could probably live another 17 years without drinking, if I tried. Seeing drunk people get all crazy and sloppy and sometimes too wild gets old, after awhile...I just wanna change the channel.

I know what you all are thinking, what the hell Jenn..this blog was depressing and hypocritical!

Well I say suck it.

I heard these students having A REAL CONVERSATION about things that mattered, cut the bullshit. It's time to get serious.

PEOPLE WHO ONLY CARE ABOUT SEX, DRUGS, AND ALCOHOL NEED NOT APPLY:
I'm looking for some good company...who like to party SOMETIMES.

even though I do dread the 3 hours I spend twice a week in that class...at least I'm learning something.

...and sometimes that's better than nothing.

OKAY, OKAY back to less morose and thought provoking blogs.

-j

(don't worry, I'm still tryna party...just not EVERY week)

Not my motto...

ME UP.

Greek Sauce...(get it?)

I've officially been submerged into the "Greek" language, and I can barely speak my own native language.

So I've been known as the weirdo all my life with weird lingo, and certain words and sentences I piece together, I hardly know what it means. However when I did become part of a sorority and hang out more and more with greek people, I started to pick up certain things that I have honestly never heard before. Some phrases/words I actually do like and use from time to time, but there are just some words that I feel should be deleted from having that second connotation.

Ready, set, flow...

SWOOOOOOOOP!
ex: "I was gonna make out with DeAndre, but Deshawnda helllla swooooooped on me!"
Meaning someone inadvertedly cockblocked you. I actually do like this term, because it is sort of a swift movement that goes on, when someone does sweep that person from underneath your feet. Like, SWOOP THERE IT IS! Trust me, it happens a lot. So much that you need a saying that is short and sweet and straight to the point, I believe that SWOOP does that. The noun "Swooper" is even better, cause let's be honest, there are a lot out there, and sometimes I do prefer to be politically correct and say SWOOPER, instead of COCKBLOCKER in front of people. Especially children ages 3+

CROSS FADED
ex: "I can't drove home, I'm fucked up...I'm cross faded"
Okay, so technically I heard this term in highschool. However I was hoping that when I got to college that it was going to disappear because it sounds really stupid. It means that you're under the influence 2 different ways, usually high and drunk. I think it sounds more like something in MORTAL COMBAT or like TOKYO DRIFT. Like "Omg Scorpion just cross faded Sub Zero." Unfortunately that term is here to stay.

CUPCAKE
So I don't know if like Fat Joe invented this term or Rosie O' Donnell but I personally HATE this term.
ex: "Yoker is totally cupcaking with Jelissa" (yeah I tried it make it sound cholo)
WHAT THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN MEAN? Technically I guess it means to be sweet to someone. But if that were the case, why can't we use the term..."Donut?"
Like, "Dammmmmmmn Yoker is donuting with Jelissa" Same shit, different pastry.
All I know is, if someone refers to me dating someone as cupcaking, I will literally take a real cupcake and smash it in their face. Sorry, so angry. But food should never be a reference to romance...with one exception: "I love you like a fat kid loves cake". Thanks 50.

FAMS/Pseudo/Fave= Don't hate these terms, but don't love em either. What ever happened to calling people by their names, or by other terms of endearment like "booboo"?

THE PIT
okay...so this only really related to my school.
ex: "I parked at the pit, walk with me so I don't get buttraped!"
The pit refers to the area that is between 2 parking structures. I guess you could call it the middle, but the pit is more distinct. I surprisingly always park there so yes I do use the term. However only certain people call it that, and if you were to say it to anyone else, they would think you were crazy. I personally think "the pit" sounds like a ring for illegal cockfighting and drugs. "I picked up my meth at the pit" or "Yeah I got gonorrhea from the pit". Don't worry these sentences are fake, nothing like that goes on in the pit. I HOPE, OTHERWISE I HAVE TO FIND SOMEWHERE ELSE TO PARK.

So I could post up 589328502530 more words and phrases that I hear allll the time now in college, but I am on the verge of getting carpal tunnel syndrome (spelling?) or arthritis in my hands. Same shit, different term.

You get the point...

go slang!
<3 j boo boo (a.k.a. not a swooper)

Trick whORe Treat

So as I am writing this, I am thinking of all of the brilliant halloween costumes that I have seen throughout the ages.

One common theme that I did notice, was that as the years go by less and less is worn by both men and women!

I mean, I know there's a recession but I'm pretty sure walking out in a loincloth and messy hair and saying that you're Tarzan is still borderline indecent exposure. (which can sometimes be a good thing, am I right ladies?) haha. Anywhozels, here's an example.

The point of Halloween was to wear something scary right? The point is to scare people with a ridiculously and shockingly gruesome costume...

I guess the ladies are taking a different approach, they are using the OTHER scare factor. Pretty much, the message in this era is "I'm going to look so goddamn sexy in my string of a costume that I'm going to scare your pants off". Am I right? Why else would the typical gorilla costume be later translated into society today as a girl just wearing a fur bikini and holding a banana. I guess it's the same.

This is what used to be considered normal...


Now this is more of what you see on the streets...circa NOW


So here are a couple of SHALLOWeen costumes that I have thought of for you ladies, who want to use this scary holiday as a chance to showcase their lack of or gift of good looks.

Banana...
I know what you're thinking, WHY THE FUCK WOULD I WANT TO BE A BANANA? They aren't even sexy. Here's my idea ladies. Find a tight yellow dress that has a zipper in the front, trust me. There are some. Then wear a cute creme colored bra underneath and unzip it enough so that you can see the bra, and wear it with yellow pumps. Then just make a Chiquita banana sticker stick it on anywhere you want. Possibly by the end of the night, the whole peel will come off.

Grizzly bear...
I know you're thinking...being hairy is NOT CUTE BOO BOO. But I saw a black fur vest at forever 21 ( yeah of course there! right?) So wear that black fur vest with a cute black bra and some black boyshorts. Then take make some black bear ears out of cutting up felt and gluing it to a headband. Finally finishing touches, I saw a honey jar purse at party city, and some black pumps. ta-dah! you just made winnie the pooh look like a douche.

Michael Jackson...
I know that every guy is probably going to be Michael Jackson for halloween cause he is THE LEGEND, however girls can too. Just wear a cute white shirt, but tie it up so that your stomach shows. Next wear it with either a red/maroon leather jacket or a member's only jacket ( something bomber jacket style). Next wear some sequined booty shorts (saw some at pink zone) with white socks that show and black heels. Finally finish it off with a white sequined glove, and a cute fedora hat.

So...those are just a few ideas that I know most people think of and assume girls cannot make sexy. However, it is possible! Trust me, if you can make a nun outfit slutty, you can make BABYBOP slutty!

I don't know exactly what I'm going to be for halloween, but I have a couple of tricks up my sleeve. Looks like you're just going to have to hang out with me to see what I am. I ain't playa hating, I always skank up my halloween costume...I have been since 8th grade (don't tell my mom).

However, there is one costume that I WOULD NOT MIND SEEING THIS YEAR...


...SEXaroni pizza, anyone? I'll have a slice.

-dont quote me on that...
<3 jenilla killah